re honouring each other

Sat Nov 21 09:11:33 PST 2009

this reminds me of a conversation with merrelyn emery during a search
conference and participative design training program, exploring the question
of whether or not it was ethical to do search conference in search of the
future of some nasty corporate interests.  i've heard that question pop up
here over the years, too... would you open space for the corporate interest
or that?  there have been observations along the way that some street gangs
and terrorist groups might be operating in open space ways.

merrelyn's response years ago was "of course i'd work with those companies,
even on in those areas where they're trying to do nasty things... how are
they ever going to change if we don't get in there and work with them?"
like wendy sez, expansino and contraction, inseparable.

and this is what i think is the greatest learning/teaching for everyone in
open space, participants everywhere... that our behavior in this space, list
space, community space, together space, world space... makes a difference.
that there is a field and we are part of it.

open space practice, as facilitator AND/OR participant is, i thnk,
ultimately about learning to sense the larger field AND simultaneously take
action.  four principles, it's a big world and you're not in charge... and
two feet, you have and do make choices and actions matter.

i understand our practice as the refinement of our pulsation between these
poles.  until our every step is taken not just IN, but AS full awareness of
the whole field.  in practical terms i quoted yesterday from birgitt, on
language... in organizations, through the practice of open space, front-line
workers come to understand and own the big picture, and senior staffers come
to appreciate the minute-by-minute challenges of the front-line -- so that
everyone is working together.

the space is the space.  not good or bad.  and expansion and contraction are
probably individual choices.  did the space contract a few days ago, or did
some people contract and others follow along, until somebody(ies) chose to
be otherwise?

the pain, i think, comes in being swept along by the tide of expansion OR
contraction, in being a captive of that wave rather than a surfer atop it.
we learn to use expansion to grow, and contraction to make changes and
ends.  both are needed, both are dangerous, but since they're not separable,
i guess we just need to be more and more aware, and more and more careful!

m

--

Michael Herman
Michael Herman Associates

http://www.michaelherman.com
http://www.ronanparktrail.com
http://www.chicagoconservationcorps.org
http://www.openspaceworld.org

312-280-7838 (mobile)

On Sat, Nov 21, 2009 at 10:42 AM, ashley cooper <mail.easilyamazed at gmail.com
> wrote:

> I agree with you, Wendy, about the essence of contraction and expansion.
> I'm intrigued by how people perceive/experience 'this space'. There is a
> great deal of diversity present in the OSlist space... a fundamental aspect
> that keeps it vibrant.
>
> And I'm intrigued by the perception that areas of the space may feel closed
> to moments of contraction.
>
> What are some of the forms that arise as a system learns to breathe
> together?
>
>
> On Sat, Nov 21, 2009 at 11:33 AM, Wendy Farmer-O'Neil <wendy at xe.net>wrote:
>
>> No Erik.  That would neither be possible nor desirable.  Contraction and
>> Expansion.  Breathing.  The breath is an essential part of both the form and
>> the essence of Open Space and Life.
>>
>> Love,
>> Wendy
>>
>>
>> On 21-Nov-09, at 6:33 AM, Erik Fabian wrote:
>>
>>  Is this space closed to moments of contraction?
>>>
>>> Erik
>>>
>>>
>>> On Fri, 20 Nov 2009 11:12:32 -0600, Denise Tennen <
>>> denisetennen at comcast.net> wrote:
>>>
>>>  Thank you so much for your comments, Wendy
>>>>
>>>> Denise
>>>> On Nov 20, 2009, at 4:51 AM, Wendy Farmer-O'Neil wrote:
>>>>
>>>>  In my experience, truth is relative.  It depends essentially on my
>>>>> perspective.  The vaster my perspective, the more many-faceted
>>>>> truth appears.  Until the very notion of truth becomes more of a
>>>>> living process than a static fact.
>>>>>
>>>>> I have experienced contraction in the resonant field of OSList
>>>>> throughout this conversation.  To me that signals the presence of
>>>>> aggression.  Aggression can be very subtle or very blatant.  Either
>>>>> way, it stimulates hurt, often in those other than its target.
>>>>>
>>>>> I am a student of Aikido, so violence, non-violence, aggression,
>>>>> its evocation, its arising, and its transformation are my daily
>>>>> bread.  I still have a lifetime�s worth to learn about it.  I
>>>>> believe that the purpose of conflict is harmony.  What I have
>>>>> learned so far, is that aggression is a destructive, life denying
>>>>> vector in that equation.  And that clean heart anger is a
>>>>> generative life affirming vector.
>>>>>
>>>>> I have yet to hear clean heart anger in this conversation.  I have
>>>>> heard a lot of aggression in a variety of forms and guises.  I have
>>>>> also heard hurt, pain, sadness, confusion, frustration, to name a few.
>>>>>
>>>>> I will share what my experience has been in service to transparency
>>>>> if it serves no better purpose.
>>>>>
>>>>> I feel contraction when I hear OS and NVC spoken of as tools
>>>>> because for me, they have become profound ways of being in the world.
>>>>>
>>>>> I feel contraction when I hear pain in Chris Corrigan�s voice when
>>>>> he wonders why this conversation needs to unfold this way between
>>>>> people he cares about.
>>>>>
>>>>> I feel contraction when I hear blame, shame and name-calling.
>>>>>
>>>>> I feel contraction when I recognize the operation of a poisoned
>>>>> well argument.
>>>>>
>>>>> I feel contraction when I hear someone caught in the steel jaws of
>>>>> an old hurt.
>>>>>
>>>>> I feel contraction when i hear the pain of someone who has had to
>>>>> fight too damn hard for every inch and breath.
>>>>>
>>>>> I feel contraction when I see more unsubscribes in a day than I
>>>>> usually see in a month.
>>>>>
>>>>> I feel care, concern, pain, and sadness when I think of all of you
>>>>> in this circle who are listening or speaking.  It is you who I most
>>>>> want to speak to right now.
>>>>>
>>>>> Here is my hand.
>>>>>
>>>>> I offer it in absolute commitment.  I will never put you out of my
>>>>> heart. I will hold space with and for you through it all.  Even in
>>>>> our most shadowed , unloved and disowned places.  I�m game to face
>>>>> the monsters of the deep.  I prefer them to the shallows.
>>>>>
>>>>> I will name that the use of violence and aggression cloaked as the
>>>>> servant of truth has been the strategy of many who would prefer to
>>>>> silence, persecute, oppress and discredit those whose opinions or
>>>>> choices were in conflict with their own agendas.  It has been the
>>>>> root of much human suffering.  I can feel suffering present on this
>>>>> list right now.  I don�t like it.  I won�t support it.  I am
>>>>> saddened that people I admire and respect are behaving this way.  I
>>>>> am requesting that it stop. I am also requesting that the back-
>>>>> channel story-telling stop.  If you do not have the integrity to
>>>>> air your complaints directly, at least have the decency not to
>>>>> perpetrate slander. (And I am speaking about everyone involved not
>>>>> one person in particular, because I�m certain it�s going on in
>>>>> several directions.)
>>>>>
>>>>> I guess we have finally grown up.  We are apparently big enough,
>>>>> brave enough, and ready enough to face a real dragon.  Can�t wait
>>>>> to see what we do with the treasure.
>>>>>
>>>>> In deepest respect and with great love for you all,
>>>>>
>>>>> Wendy
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>>
>>>>> On 20-Nov-09, at 1:12 AM, Michael Herman wrote:
>>>>>
>>>>> Wendy Farmer-O'Neil
>>>>> CEO Prospera Consulting
>>>>> wendy at xe.net
>>>>> 1-800-713-2351
>>>>>
>>>>> The moment of change is the only poem. -- Adrienne Rich
>>>>>
>>>>> *
>>>>> *
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>>>>
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>> Wendy Farmer-O'Neil
>> CEO Prospera Consulting
>> wendy at xe.net
>> 1-800-713-2351
>>
>> The moment of change is the only poem. -- Adrienne Rich
>>
>> *
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>
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