How do you respond to unsatisfying experiences of "open" space?

[Jack Ricchiuto]

I think your emphasis, Harrison, on learning is very fair and compelling.

For perspective, I remind myself that I know as many people who have been
disappointed by spending time in open space as I know people who have been
disappointed by spending time at oceans and mountains.

Of course people can come to open space with (impatient/passionate)
expectations that represent a depth of insight and action that may take
several open spaces to achieve. Why call any single step on the path failure
when each step is in itself complete success as a vital step along the way?
Open space invites us to love the destination that resides in our hearts,
the path, and each (w)holy step.


Jack


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jack ricchiuto
two.one.six/three.seven.three/seven.four.seven.five
www.designinglife.com / www.appreciativeleadership.com



From: Harrison Owen <hhowen at verizon.net>
Organization: HH Owen and Co.
Reply-To: <hhowen at verizon.net>
Date: Sat, 28 Jan 2006 08:38:18 -0500
To: <OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU>
Subject: Re: How do you respond to unsatisfying experiences of "open" space?

Christy Wrote: What, if anything, do you say/do/think when someone says to
you, "oh, I've been to an Open Space Technology meeting before, and I didn't
like it, and wouldn't want to do it again," and upon gentle inquiry you
discover that what they were told was "Open Space" was not really so very
open? And/or that something was missing (for example, session summaries
weren't posted or shared or compiled in a timely way, or at all)? And
especially when the spaces in question were held by really wonderful people
(definitely possessing "good heads and good hearts") whom you like very
much?


 
Christy I can definitely see the tenderness of the situation. I¹ve been
there once or twice. The first part seems pretty easy ­ which I have dealt
with by saying something like, ³I am not sure why XX did it the way they did
­ but ordinarily I Š.(fill in the blanks).² Then we come to the diplomatic
part ­ but maybe the most essential. One of the basic principles for me in
our Open Space Community is that we share what we learn. Most times it seems
that we can share the good times and the good new ideas and insights (Open
Space always works for most people J). Then we have situations such as you
are talking about. A little difficult for sure, but the learning
possibilities are really great. You might say something like Š²I was talking
to one of your participants and she/he said that ____ didn¹t quite work for
them. What do you suppose we could learn from that? And how could we do it
better? Seems to me that puts the whole conversation in a win/win mode. You
learn something, your friend learns something -- and then if you share the
insights ­ we all learn something.
 
I have found that deep learning always takes place at the points of anomaly
or mal-function, -- those instances when something happened that should not
have taken place. Or -- didn¹t happen when it should have. All of a sudden I
am aware of ³difference.² And difference for me is the cutting edge of
learning. When everything works as expected, just like usual ­ that is
wonderful, but I don¹t think we learn very much or at least no learning that
makes a difference.
 
And of course, learning is always painful to some degree. I mean real
learning ­ because assimilating difference can be rather a pain. When it
becomes clear that the old comfortable pattern, idea, way of being just
won¹t make it any more, letting go has its cost. And sometimes it is very
painful. Let¹s suppose that your friend was basically a control freak in
disguise (we all are to some extent). She/he said all the right words, but
at the end of the day, the need to be ³in charge² was just overwhelming. And
it showed. And the space closed, and the folks were unhappy.
 
Bringing that sort of thing to the surface can really be hard. But the ³up²
side is immense. Perhaps she/he really wanted to let go, but wasn¹t able to.
You could help. Or maybe he/she really thought she/he should be in charge,
in which case Open Space is definitely not the proper cup of tea. Well you
get the idea.
 
Harrison
 
 
 

Harrison Owen 
7808 River Falls Drive
Potomac, Maryland   20854
Phone 301-365-2093 
Skype hhowen 
Open Space Training www.openspaceworld.com <http://www.openspaceworld.com/>
Open Space Institute www.openspaceworld.org <http://www.openspaceworld.org/>
Personal website www.ho-image.com <http://www.ho-image.com/>
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-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of Christy
Lee-Engel
Sent: Friday, January 27, 2006 11:30 PM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: How do you respond to unsatisfying experiences of "open" space?
 
Hello dear open space friends,

What, if anything, do you say/do/think when someone says to you, "oh, I've
been to an Open Space Technology meeting before, and I didn't like it, and
wouldn't want to do it again,"

and upon gentle inquiry you discover that what they were told was "Open
Space" was not really so very open? And/or that something was missing (for
example, session summaries weren't posted or shared or compiled in a timely
way, or at all)? 

And especially when the spaces in question were held by really wonderful
people (definitely possessing "good heads and good hearts") whom you like
very much?

thank you,
Christy Lee-Engel
Seattle 
-- 
weblog: http://lifecultivatinglife.blogspot.com * *
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