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<TITLE>Re: How do you respond to unsatisfying experiences of "open" space?</TITLE>
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<FONT FACE="Arial"><SPAN STYLE='font-size:14.0px'>I think your emphasis, Harrison, on learning is very fair and compelling. <BR>
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For perspective, I remind myself that I know as many people who have been disappointed by spending time in open space as I know people who have been disappointed by spending time at oceans and mountains.<BR>
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Of course people can come to open space with (impatient/passionate) expectations that represent a depth of insight and action that may take several open spaces to achieve. Why call any single step on the path failure when each step is in itself complete success as a vital step along the way? Open space invites us to love the destination that resides in our hearts, the path, and each (w)holy step.<BR>
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</FONT><FONT COLOR="#808080"><FONT FACE="Papyrus, Times New Roman">jack ricchiuto<BR>
two.one.six/three.seven.three/seven.four.seven.five<BR>
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<HR ALIGN=CENTER SIZE="3" WIDTH="95%"><B>From: </B>Harrison Owen <hhowen@verizon.net><BR>
<B>Organization: </B>HH Owen and Co.<BR>
<B>Reply-To: </B><hhowen@verizon.net><BR>
<B>Date: </B>Sat, 28 Jan 2006 08:38:18 -0500<BR>
<B>To: </B><OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU><BR>
<B>Subject: </B>Re: How do you respond to unsatisfying experiences of "open" space?<BR>
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</SPAN></FONT><FONT COLOR="#FF0000"><FONT SIZE="4"><FONT FACE="Arial"><SPAN STYLE='font-size:16.0px'>Christy Wrote:</SPAN></FONT></FONT></FONT><FONT COLOR="#000099"><FONT FACE="Trebuchet MS, Verdana, Helvetica, Arial"><SPAN STYLE='font-size:14.0px'> What, if anything, do you say/do/think when someone says to you, "oh, I've been to an Open Space Technology meeting before, and I didn't like it, and wouldn't want to do it again," and upon gentle inquiry you discover that what they were told was "Open Space" was not really so very open? And/or that something was missing (for example, session summaries weren't posted or shared or compiled in a timely way, or at all)? And especially when the spaces in question were held by really wonderful people (definitely possessing "good heads and good hearts") whom you like very much?<BR>
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Christy I can definitely see the tenderness of the situation. I’ve been there once or twice. The first part seems pretty easy – which I have dealt with by saying something like, “I am not sure why XX did it the way they did – but ordinarily I ….(fill in the blanks).” Then we come to the diplomatic part – but maybe the most essential. One of the basic principles for me in our Open Space Community is that we share what we learn. Most times it seems that we can share the good times and the good new ideas and insights (Open Space always works for most people </SPAN></FONT></FONT><FONT FACE="Wingdings"><SPAN STYLE='font-size:14.0px'>J</SPAN></FONT><SPAN STYLE='font-size:14.0px'><FONT FACE="Arial">). Then we have situations such as you are talking about. A little difficult for sure, but the learning possibilities are really great. You might say something like …”I was talking to one of your participants and she/he said that ____ didn’t quite work for them. What do you suppose we could learn from that? And how could we do it better? Seems to me that puts the whole conversation in a win/win mode. You learn something, your friend learns something -- and then if you share the insights – we all learn something.<BR>
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I have found that deep learning always takes place at the points of anomaly or mal-function, -- those instances when something happened that should not have taken place. Or -- didn’t happen when it should have. All of a sudden I am aware of “difference.” And difference for me is the cutting edge of learning. When everything works as expected, just like usual – that is wonderful, but I don’t think we learn very much or at least no learning that makes a difference.<BR>
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And of course, learning is always painful to some degree. I mean real learning – because assimilating difference can be rather a pain. When it becomes clear that the old comfortable pattern, idea, way of being just won’t make it any more, letting go has its cost. And sometimes it is very painful. Let’s suppose that your friend was basically a control freak in disguise (we all are to some extent). She/he said all the right words, but at the end of the day, the need to be “in charge” was just overwhelming. And it showed. And the space closed, and the folks were unhappy. <BR>
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Bringing that sort of thing to the surface can really be hard. But the “up” side is immense. Perhaps she/he really wanted to let go, but wasn’t able to. You could help. Or maybe he/she really thought she/he should be in charge, in which case Open Space is definitely not the proper cup of tea. Well you get the idea.<BR>
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Harrison<BR>
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</SPAN></FONT></FONT></FONT><FONT FACE="Tahoma"><SPAN STYLE='font-size:13.0px'>-----Original Message-----<BR>
<B>From:</B> OSLIST [<a href="mailto:OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU]">mailto:OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU]</a> <B>On Behalf Of </B>Christy Lee-Engel<BR>
<B>Sent:</B> Friday, January 27, 2006 11:30 PM<BR>
<B>To:</B> OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU<BR>
<B>Subject:</B> How do you respond to unsatisfying experiences of "open" space?<BR>
</SPAN></FONT><FONT SIZE="4"><FONT FACE="Times New Roman"><SPAN STYLE='font-size:16.0px'> <BR>
</SPAN></FONT><SPAN STYLE='font-size:16.0px'><FONT COLOR="#000099"><FONT FACE="Trebuchet MS, Verdana, Helvetica, Arial">Hello dear open space friends,<BR>
<BR>
What, if anything, do you say/do/think when someone says to you, "oh, I've been to an Open Space Technology meeting before, and I didn't like it, and wouldn't want to do it again," <BR>
<BR>
and upon gentle inquiry you discover that what they were told was "Open Space" was not really so very open? And/or that something was missing (for example, session summaries weren't posted or shared or compiled in a timely way, or at all)? <BR>
<BR>
And especially when the spaces in question were held by really wonderful people (definitely possessing "good heads and good hearts") whom you like very much?<BR>
<BR>
thank you,<BR>
Christy Lee-Engel<BR>
Seattle <BR>
</FONT></FONT></SPAN></FONT><FONT FACE="Optima, Times New Roman"><SPAN STYLE='font-size:14.0px'>-- <BR>
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