My reflections on the Goa OSonOS (longish)/My greatest learning in OS

Tue Oct 5 09:15:41 PDT 2004

Hello,

Alex, what topics did you post at OSonOS Goa, or OSonOS Denmark? What do
you want to talk about? What are you passionate about concerning OS?

You are responsible for your experience at OS meetings, and outside of
OS meetings for that matter. And I see you are trying to do something
about your frustrations - talking about your frustrations at evening
news, attending a session about what to do, posting to the list.

In my experience, all you can do is invite others to talk about what you
wish to talk about and go from there.

Having seen your frustrations listed: *Not much listening.*Not much
depth.*Too large groups.*Too much weird stuff.*Experienced OS'ers don't
seem open to input.*Evening circle takes too long*

and having read Harrison's thoughts

"All of the issues ran on a deeper level, I thought. The second package was what I might call
generational change. The number of younger (and new) faces was striking, and
even more striking was the commitment and knowledge they brought to the
table. Some really significant work going on, and it was indeed an honor to
sit at their feet." - HO

I wonder what needs to be done, added, enhanced. I was not there so I
can't chime in on OSonOS Goa.

It sounds to me from what you (Alex) wrote that in most cases you used
your two feet to have an experience that was worthwhile - "many great
and inspiring conversations outside of the sessions". And as Harrison
pointed out, sometimes it is just these conversations that happen
outside of the given structures which make an event worthwhile and
special - sometimes beyond the scope of what you thought was possible,
sometimes down the road somewhere that you can't even see the results.

Passion bounded by responsibility is a key foundation to any successful
OS. In my experience when the proverbial you is frustrated by something
it indicates that the proverbial you is somehow frustrated in themselves
somewhere in their lives. The first step in my experience is to see
where I am *Not listening.*Not going in depth.*Too weird or not weird
enough.*not being open to input.*taking too long.*not taking long
enough.* - The first step is to take responsibility for your own
experience. Perhaps you (Alex) have already done this, I have no way of
knowing. Passion bounded by responsibility is a key learning I have
taken from my OS experience.

Other learnings from my OS experiences include Whatever Happens is the
Only Thing that Could - No woulda's coulda's shoulda's.

In the past I have not responded to posts that seemed blaming, and I
recognize your statement:

"I say this without any intention of blame or indictment. Please also
remember that this kind of thing always looks worse in worse in writing.
And as I said at the conference, I only say this, because I think the OS
community can deal with it, and should be given a chance to do so -
rather than just me dealing with it on my own by not coming to any more
OSonOS'es." - Alex

however, in writing your post did seem blaming. I'm still not sure why I
am responding to this particular post, but something struck me in Romy's
post about what we have learned from OS. I find that I have a passion to
write.

So, I'd like to add my name to Romy's invitation to share what you've
learned in OS.

What did you learn at OSonOS Goa? Where can you take responsibility for
your experiences and for your passions? How can I take responsibility
for my thoughts and passions? How can I best invite others to join in
conversation?

How can we move forward together?

With Grace and Love,

Zelle

************
Zelle Nelson
Engaging the Soul at Work/Know Place Like Home/State of Grace Document

www.stateofgracedocument.com

zelle at maureenandzelle.com
office - 828.693.0802
mobile - 847.951.7030

Ravenswood - Isle of Skye
2021 Greenville Hwy
Flat Rock, NC 28731
Alexander Kjerulf wrote:

> Hi
>
> I just got back from India, and here are my reflections on this years
> OSonOS.
>
> First of all there were lots of things I enjoyed about the OSonOS:
>
>    * I met some wonderful people, some for the first time; some again
>    * The place was absolutely wonderful - See for yourself, I posted
>      some pictures here: http://www.positivesharing.com/Goa
>    * I had many great and inspiring conversations outside of the sessions
>    * And best of all, we (the Happy at Work Project) may now have a
>      shot at creating the Happy at Work Project, India
>
> BUT :-)
>
> Those of you who were there know that I was frustrated with the
> conference itself. This was also true at last years event in Denmark
> (the first OSonOS I attended) but at that time I chose not to express it.
>
> During the evening news on the second day, I presented my observations
> on what frustrated me. I realize of course that these are only my
> experiences. Other people may have (and indeed did have) totally
> different experiences. Anyway, here's what frustrated me at the OSonOS:
> *Not much listening.* People seemed more eager to speak than to listen.
> *Not much depth.* Few conversations achieved any real depth, since many
> comments didn't seem to build on what was said earlier in the
> conversation.
> *Too large groups.* Many (most?) groups had 10 - 20 people in them,
> which of course makes deep conversation and listening more difficult.
> For my taste, I prefer groups with at most 8 people.
> *Too much weird stuff.* Every day of the OSonOS opened with singing,
> chanting, laughter exercises and other "weird stuff" :-) . I have
> nothing against that in itself (and indeed use some of it once in a
> while), but it didn't really add to my experience.
> *Experienced OS'ers don't seem open to input*. The experienced OS people
> in the crowd were wonderfully willing to share their experiences, but
> seemed less willing to listen to new ideas.
> *Evening circle takes too long*. The evening circle went on for a long
> time - too long in my opinion.
>
> I say this without any intention of blame or indictment. Please also
> remember that this kind of thing always looks worse in worse in writing.
> And as I said at the conference, I only say this, because I think the OS
> community can deal with it, and should be given a chance to do so -
> rather than just me dealing with it on my own by not coming to any more
> OSonOS'es.
>
> The paradox here is, that all the conversations I had outside of the
> sessions really made my coming there worthwhile, so my time there was
> certainly not wasted. It's just that I KNOW that OS conversations can be
> so much more than what I saw at both this and last years OSonOS'es.
>
> Now, I'm not going to throw something like this out there, without also
> thinking about what we can do about it, and so we did a session on that
> on the third day. We saw some ideas brewing as to what we could do to
> improve the OSonOS, while at the same time maintaining (and maybe even
> strengthening) all the good things the OSonOS does for the OS community
> already. This is not about revolution, it's about taking an appreciative
> approach to what already works in the OSonOS, and how we can build on
> that.
>
> But before we start that, there should be some sort of buy-in from the
> OS community. If the prevailing mood is, that "the OSonOS is fine, don't
> mess with it", then we'll leave it at the. If the mood is "The OSonOS is
> fine, let's make it even more fine", then we might start with an
> appreciative inquiry right here on the list - I'd be happy to get it
> going.
>
> What do you think?
>
> Cheers
>
> Alex
>
> --
> Alexander Kjerulf
> alexander at kjerulf.com
> http://www.positivesharing.com
>
> +45 2688 2373
> Tagensvej 126, lejl. 613
> 2200 København N
>
> *
> *
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ÐÏ à¡± á

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