[OSList] Thank you, my mother, and Chile

Fri Jun 24 18:49:05 PDT 2011

What a beautiful love story Lisa. thank you!  You teach us love and are
loved!

On Fri, Jun 24, 2011 at 6:02 PM, Lisa Heft <lisaheft at openingspace.net>wrote:

> Hello, dear colleagues -
>
> I appreciate all the love and support you have sent me both on and off the
> list as you heard the news of my mother's passing.
>
> As you may have read from previous messages - I was in Chile facilitating
> several Open Space Learning Workshops as my mother was moving through her
> transition from life into death.
> My father and I have been taking care of her for 10 years as her health has
> shifted. They live close to me in a wonderful elders residence and I am
> there all the time as we are very close emotionally.  My life is a lovely
> balance of self care, parental care and this wonderful work that we
> facilitator folks do. This time has been a true and bittersweet gift. To be
> able to love them both up by being there, caring for them, sharing thoughts
> and emotions, and knowing that we love each other has been an amazing gift.
> I feel very lucky to have this sort of relationship with my parents, and I
> know that not everybody has this opportunity, and I treasure it.
>
> The last few years have required more care as my mother has become more
> delicate in health and our lives have been intertwined as my parents and I
> have traveled together through these experiences.
> At the end of April my mother became critically ill, and since that time
> she had been making an amazingly graceful progression towards death and
> release, surrounded by loving care and loved ones.
> I had a strong feeling she would die while I was away teaching in Chile -
> however my father (and my mother's voice was also very strong inside my
> head) said 'Go! Go! Live! This is what it is all about - sharing learning
> and community across the world!' about Open Space and dialogue and the power
> of a diverse community. Sharing knowledge, love and peace.
> So I went.
>
> My classes and the fabulous WOSonOS 2011 Host Team knew that I was sad and
> concerned about my mother and father during my travels, and they loved me up
> and held their arms open for whatever shape my concern and worry would take
> - while at the same time they traveled with me through rich learning and
> exploration about Open Space in these workshops.
>
> The first group of participants was about 65 graduate students and faculty
> of the Masters program in Organizational Development and Strategic People
> Management in the School of Economics and Business at Universidad Diego
> Portales in Santiago de Chile - as well as members of the 2011 Host
> Team. They welcomed my teaching in Spanish (including my various words in
> 'Spanglish' that either worked or were hilarious errors) as well as my
> sharing about my mother. The talking / listening piece I use in my Open
> Spaces is a stone from the sea that my mother gave to me when I was a small
> child  - so they learned about my love and concern when we went into Closing
> Circle in the Open Space meeting that is a part of my workshop. The second
> group of participants was about 50 facilitators, coaches and executive
> directors of NGO's / non-profit organizations, in our workshop hosted by the
> School of Psychology at the Universidad Aldolfo Ibañez in Santiago de Chile.
>
> One evening during the first workshop dates I suddenly had a feeling that
> my mother was waiting for me to return home from my travels before she could
> die. I have been at many deaths and have seen this happen, where people wait
> for their loved ones before letting go.  And I told her not to do that for
> me - but to fly...to let go...with my love.  I woke up the next day to find
> an email message that she had died at that exact moment. No surprise, our
> profound connection.
>
> I came in to that next workshop day with the news that my mother had died.
> And I said 'If you are okay with me crying, I am okay with continuing on
> with you in this learning journey. It is what my mother would want. She
> believes in our work together. And besides - if you want to be facilitators
> - emotions happen. This is real. Shall we continue?' And they did, with open
> arms. And with stories throughout the day of mothers and love.
>
> During the second workshop I was of course still quite emotional, and I
> shared the story of my mother when we came again to that point with the
> listening stone. Once again I was held in open arms and once again we
> continued to explore rich learning together in and about Open Space. At the
> end of that workshop, one of the participants gave me a gift - a necklace
> that her mother made for me. Each night she had gone home to tell her mother
> about the workshop, and her mother had felt a deep connection with me even
> though we had not met. I treasure that necklace, and that experience.
>
> My father now wears both his own and my mother's wedding rings - artful
> little pieces with lapis, agate, jade and other stones inset in gold. On his
> desk calendar, on the day she died, he has drawn a picture of little hearts,
> flying away up into the sky. And we look up into that sky and see the stars
> and think that one of them - or all of them - is my mother. But then I feel
> my mother and father in every word and act and deed I do - I always have -
> in every moment of my work with groups and my remembering to be the truest
> me that I can be. My mother and father are everywhere in me and in
> everything I touch and experience.
>
> So I am a lucky girl - and most loved, by my parents, and by you...
>
> Thank you all, and take good care of yourselves and the mothers and fathers
> you have or for the mother-father love you have created for yourself inside
> of you.
>
> Perhaps I will see some of you at the WOSonOS in Chile this October...
>
> Lisa
> *
>
> Lisa Heft
> *
> Consultant, Facilitator, Educator
> *Opening Space*
> lisaheft at openingspace.net
>
>
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>

-- 
Suzanne Daigle
NuFocus Strategic Group
7159 Victoria Circle
University Park, FL 34201
FL 941-359-8877;
CT 203-722-2009
www.nufocusgroup.com
s.daigle at nufocusgroup.com
twitter @suzannedaigle
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