[OSList] Thank you, my mother, and Chile

Thomas Herrmann thomas at openspaceconsulting.com
Mon Jul 4 12:22:00 PDT 2011


Thanks dear Lisa for being so generous, in all directions


and thanks for sharing your journey with me

All my love to everything

& love and hugs to you too

Thomas Herrmann

 

 

Från: oslist-bounces at lists.openspacetech.org
[mailto:oslist-bounces at lists.openspacetech.org] För Lisa Heft
Skickat: den 25 juni 2011 00:02
Till: OSLIST
Ämne: [OSList] Thank you, my mother, and Chile

 

Hello, dear colleagues -

 

I appreciate all the love and support you have sent me both on and off the
list as you heard the news of my mother's passing.

 

As you may have read from previous messages - I was in Chile facilitating
several Open Space Learning Workshops as my mother was moving through her
transition from life into death.

My father and I have been taking care of her for 10 years as her health has
shifted. They live close to me in a wonderful elders residence and I am
there all the time as we are very close emotionally.  My life is a lovely
balance of self care, parental care and this wonderful work that we
facilitator folks do. This time has been a true and bittersweet gift. To be
able to love them both up by being there, caring for them, sharing thoughts
and emotions, and knowing that we love each other has been an amazing gift.
I feel very lucky to have this sort of relationship with my parents, and I
know that not everybody has this opportunity, and I treasure it.

 

The last few years have required more care as my mother has become more
delicate in health and our lives have been intertwined as my parents and I
have traveled together through these experiences.

At the end of April my mother became critically ill, and since that time she
had been making an amazingly graceful progression towards death and release,
surrounded by loving care and loved ones.

I had a strong feeling she would die while I was away teaching in Chile -
however my father (and my mother's voice was also very strong inside my
head) said 'Go! Go! Live! This is what it is all about - sharing learning
and community across the world!' about Open Space and dialogue and the power
of a diverse community. Sharing knowledge, love and peace.

So I went.

 

My classes and the fabulous WOSonOS 2011 Host Team knew that I was sad and
concerned about my mother and father during my travels, and they loved me up
and held their arms open for whatever shape my concern and worry would take
- while at the same time they traveled with me through rich learning and
exploration about Open Space in these workshops.

 

The first group of participants was about 65 graduate students and faculty
of the Masters program in Organizational Development and Strategic People
Management in the School of Economics and Business at Universidad Diego
Portales in Santiago de Chile - as well as members of the 2011 Host Team.
They welcomed my teaching in Spanish (including my various words in
'Spanglish' that either worked or were hilarious errors) as well as my
sharing about my mother. The talking / listening piece I use in my Open
Spaces is a stone from the sea that my mother gave to me when I was a small
child  - so they learned about my love and concern when we went into Closing
Circle in the Open Space meeting that is a part of my workshop. The second
group of participants was about 50 facilitators, coaches and executive
directors of NGO's / non-profit organizations, in our workshop hosted by the
School of Psychology at the Universidad Aldolfo Ibañez in Santiago de Chile.

 

One evening during the first workshop dates I suddenly had a feeling that my
mother was waiting for me to return home from my travels before she could
die. I have been at many deaths and have seen this happen, where people wait
for their loved ones before letting go.  And I told her not to do that for
me - but to fly...to let go...with my love.  I woke up the next day to find
an email message that she had died at that exact moment. No surprise, our
profound connection.

 

I came in to that next workshop day with the news that my mother had died.
And I said 'If you are okay with me crying, I am okay with continuing on
with you in this learning journey. It is what my mother would want. She
believes in our work together. And besides - if you want to be facilitators
- emotions happen. This is real. Shall we continue?' And they did, with open
arms. And with stories throughout the day of mothers and love.

 

During the second workshop I was of course still quite emotional, and I
shared the story of my mother when we came again to that point with the
listening stone. Once again I was held in open arms and once again we
continued to explore rich learning together in and about Open Space. At the
end of that workshop, one of the participants gave me a gift - a necklace
that her mother made for me. Each night she had gone home to tell her mother
about the workshop, and her mother had felt a deep connection with me even
though we had not met. I treasure that necklace, and that experience.

 

My father now wears both his own and my mother's wedding rings - artful
little pieces with lapis, agate, jade and other stones inset in gold. On his
desk calendar, on the day she died, he has drawn a picture of little hearts,
flying away up into the sky. And we look up into that sky and see the stars
and think that one of them - or all of them - is my mother. But then I feel
my mother and father in every word and act and deed I do - I always have -
in every moment of my work with groups and my remembering to be the truest
me that I can be. My mother and father are everywhere in me and in
everything I touch and experience.

 

So I am a lucky girl - and most loved, by my parents, and by you...

 

Thank you all, and take good care of yourselves and the mothers and fathers
you have or for the mother-father love you have created for yourself inside
of you.

 

Perhaps I will see some of you at the WOSonOS in Chile this October...

 

Lisa

 

Lisa Heft

Consultant, Facilitator, Educator

Opening Space

lisaheft at openingspace.net

 

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