Present . . . and . . .

[Tree Fitzpatrick]

I am present, in the roll call.

I would like to thank those persons who have written to me privately and
thanked me for being willing to openly disclose my negative thoughts in some
recent discussions. This is not new behavior for me.  I have never really
had the same boundaries that other people have about what should remain
private. I deeply believe that all my thoughts and feelings, along with the
thoughts and feelings of anyone else in the circles I happen to find myself
in, such as the oslist, are thoughts and feelings alive in the space. My
thoughts and feelings are never unique to me.

And it is a simple fact that ANY time I have voiced negative thoughts, in
any circle, other people were thinking what I voiced.

And it is an ongoing puzzlement to me that people thank me privately for
speaking openly . . . but they do not speak openly themselves.

I feel, sometimes, a tyranny of the non-violent communicators. . . I feel
that their good intentions often have what feels like a 'violent',
suppressive influence on spaces . . . but they always seem to be perceived
as good and my directness is often attacked as bad. . . and yet I know, and
nothing will ever dissuade me from this truth, that my truth is always true
for others in the circle.

And what does it mean when there are truths no one 'dares' to voice?  The
energy still impacts the circle, still influences and affects. . . sunshine
is the best disinfectant. It is always best to name what is in the shadows.
. . and I know this to be resolutely true and I am at peace when people
attack me for being openly honest.

I can live with such negative attacks.

And I can't help but feel wistful that the folks who support me in private
would do so openly.  Thanks for the private support.

-- 
Love rays,
Tree Fitzpatrick  (check out my new address)


. . . the great and incalculable grace of love, which says, with Augustine,
"I want you to be," without being able to give any particular reason for
such supreme and unsurpassable affirmation.  -- Hannah Arendt

2175 Kittredge St Apt 615
Berkeley, CA 94704
510-665-4825

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