Law of Two Feet [Sec=Unclassified]

Thu Feb 15 15:39:57 PST 2007

Hi Bui,

My experience is that the 'person' slowly being left behind is generally counselled by the compassionate people in the session who are being affected but not enough to get up and leave. Those that leave also learn a lesson about their level of tolerance. Hopefully people give a few warnings that they are not enjoying the tone/direction and give the 'person' an opportunity to correct their course - I use a picture of 'darth vader' with a red cross through him to indicate the 'space invader' and often see people pointing towards the image when someone is dominating the session - most people have a laugh and the person corrects themselves pretty quickly and choses to either stay or leave (and usually return a little later) depending on how they respond to their now enlightened state regarding their overly passionate approach to the topic.

Cheers, Tan

-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of Bui K. Petersen
Sent: Friday, 16 February 2007 10:07 AM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: Re: Law of Two Feet [Sec=Unclassified]

This is what I was afraid of. I think is a situation where mediation would be more effective. In conflict resolution we often say "all behaviour makes sense". Empathy and compassion is usually more effective than a 2X4.

I want to add that the scenario I am thinking is not when the person in question is a boss but more like a regular member of a community. It would be unfortunate if someone chose to leave a community as a result of an OS event. But perhaps there are other perspectives out there.

Búi

Harrison Owen wrote: 

"I wonder how empowering it is for the individual left behind?"

Well, if that "difficult" person was a command and control boss - it is possible, though perhaps not likely, that he will learn something. Then again, he might go and seek alternative employment. Or - all those folks he was intimidating might do the same thing. Sometimes the universe has to hit you on the side of the head with a 2X4 just to get your attention. Painful, but effective.

Harrison

Harrison Owen

7808 River Falls Drive

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Phone 301-365-2093

Skype hhowen

Open Space Training www.openspaceworld.com <http://www.openspaceworld.com/>  

Open Space Institute www.openspaceworld.org <http://www.openspaceworld.org/> 

Personal website www.ho-image.com <http://www.ho-image.com/>  

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-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of Bui K. Petersen
Sent: Thursday, February 15, 2007 2:31 PM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: Re: Law of Two Feet

Thanks for the reassurance, Jack.

However, I am not as concerned about the to the topic and the conversation as I am with the affect on the "difficult" individual. While it may be empowering for people to simply leave an unfruitful conversation, I wonder how empowering it is for the individual left behind?

Búi

Jack Ricchiuto wrote: 

Bui,

This does happen and can hurt the development of content around an otherwise attractive topic. If the self-organizing soil of the group is fertile enough, people will continue the conversation in different places and in different ways, the way water will flow around rocks to whatever openings available. When people with passion are given freedom, good things happen no matter what. 

Translation: not to worry.

Be well,

Jack

On 2/15/07, Bui K. Petersen <bui at buildconsensus.ca > wrote: 

As someone who is still just learning and trying to find out how and when OST can be used, I am curious about people's experience with the effect the Law of Two Feet can have on irritating dominating personalities. Say for example that someone is dominating a group and practically annoying everyone else with the result of them using their two feet and leaving. How does this affect the person left behind? I have some concerns about what could happen to this person but before I mention them, I am interested to hear what others have experienced.

Curious!

Búi

-- 

-- 

Búi K. Petersen, Cert. ConRes.
mediator and facilitator
-------------------------------- 
c.solutions 
Vancouver, B.C. Canada 
Phone: 604.724.4954
Web: www.buildconsensus.ca

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