Whatever happens

[Ralph Copleman]

I am recalling an old American pop song from the 1950's, made famous by
Doris Day, I believe.  A portion of the lyrics, including the title (in
Italian) goes something like this.

Que sera, sera,
Whatever will be, will be,
The future's not ours to see,
Que sera, sera.

(The song's story line was that of a young girl asking her mother if she
will grow up to be pretty, find romance, marry a handsome guy, etc.  The
mother replied in the song's chorus, as above.)

As for our wonderful "Whatever happens..." principle, it's sort of like a
system condition for open space.  To me the words are not as important as
the underlying idea that we'll be happier, more comfortable, and more
productive as a community if, as individuals, we let go of the the need to
exercise control.  If we can get this across, it may not matter exactly how
we say it.

And on the other hand, I'm recalling something I learned in my
communications courses in graduate school.  I don't recall the author, but
these worde remain burned in memory: "If you make something so perfectly
clear that no one could possibly misunderstand, somebody will."

We can fuss over wording all we want, but ultimately we have no control over
the way people hear or interpret our words.  (In other words, whatever
happens...  The principle applies to us in our role as facilitators, too.)

Ralph Copleman

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