Advanced Butterfly Behavior

Wed Aug 16 02:40:39 PDT 2006

Hmmmm…on any given day I would find myself happy being a butterfly… happy to sit and learn from others… happy to be in an organized group… happy to flit and float.  On other days, joining in anything appears to be an effort and my desire to be with myself is strong.  Does this mean I do not follow what has passion and meaning?  Perhaps I find what has heart and meaning is LIFE itself in all its many shades and colors, all its offerings.

>From a most contented butterfly :-)

Nancy

  _____  

From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of Tree Fitzpatrick
Sent: Tuesday, August 15, 2006 5:36 PM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: Re: Advanced Butterfly Behavior

Once again, I have to weigh in and thank one of our masters, HO.  Yes, yes, yes, the butterfly is the essence of OS and any butterfly behavior resides fully within this thing we call OS.

More and more (lately I have felt completely out of control)  I am quite conscious of BEING a butterfly in each moment of my life.  

I recently attended the National Conference on Dialogue and Deliberation.  Today, in my mailbox, I was invited to give feedback about the conference.  To my puzzlement, I learned, in the survey questions, that many people reported that this conference, NCDD, was the best conference they had ever been to.  For me, it was a draining challenge to endure it:  many wonderful people (some of our own dear oslisters like Peggy and Lisa Heft!) offered excellent breakout sessions.  The plenary sessions were thoughtfully and skillfully designed and, for the most part, well-executed.  The organizers wove art and beauty into our days together.  But I could not bring myself to go to any sessions.  And when I did force myself to stumble into one or two, I felt bullied and bruised, although certainly no one was bullying me.  Certainly, I was free in every single moment of my experience of this NCDD event to be a butterfly and, most definitely, I knew this.

I got lucky at this particular conference.  I had a best buddy who also eschewed most of the formality of the event, although he had slightly different reasons than me.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity to me, on the afternoon of the second day, there was a ninety minute OS. All day on that second day, I could feel the fresh air rising.  By the time it finally came to open the space (which was done by a fine OS newbie Matthew Blom), I was feeling downright joyful and oxegenated.  I was giddy.  I was happy.  I felt at home.  During the long time it took for people to announce their sessions, I found myself criss-crossing the ballroom, almost as if I were dancing:  it felt so good to finally have permission to do what I had been doing all along.  I didn't listen to any of the agenda topics because I didn't need to:  I knew I would continue to be a butterfly.

My butterfly buddy said "You know, it is getting so if it isn't about my work in the world, I am not really interested" and I said "If it isn't in OS, I am not interested". . . and we had a fine, butterfly time doing as we pleased.  But it cost me:  I want to be respectful, kind and good.  I want to receive the wisdom and knowledge that was surely embedded in all of the fine workshops offered at NCDD:  but pre-set the schedule, put my opportunities to learn into boxes and I am gone.  What my friend was saying, I believe, is that he is interested in following what has heart and meaning for him, that it has taken him awhile to get to a place of clear intentionality, to know who he is, to know what he wishes to do, who he wishes to serve:  once someone reaches such a point, they need to become, I believe, butterflies.

Did I have a great time at NCDD?  Oh yes, yes, indeed.  Because I found the butterflies. . . or, perhaps, they found me.

I guess there is a place in the world for conferences like NCDD, to bring together 400 process activists who are striving to build both their skill base and their professionalism but if I had been allowed to hang out with those 400 people in OS instead of in boxes, gosh golly, I would have been truly bedazzled instead of just having fun with a few butterflies on the side.

On 8/15/06, Harrison Owen <hhowen at adelphia.net> wrote:

Mark -- I will match you Butterfly to Butterfly. And I win, if only because I have been doing it longer, at least in an Open Space environment. I have often thought that the only reason I didn't jettison OS after the first (successful) run was that it felt so good -- and that was all about being a Butterfly and enjoying the company of other such critters (yourself, for example) out there in the flower patch. After all, I have a notoriously short attention span, and doing something for 20 years is simply out of character. So nothing I said should be construed as derogatory to that exalted state and condition. Butterflies forever!

I guess what I was responding to in Peggy's note was that I truly didn't see the example she gave as being that of "advanced Butterfly Behavior." To me it looked pretty much like same old, same old, (pre-selected group) and truth be told -- "narrow minded and short sighted." If folks choose such activity, so be it and God love them. But from where I sit, it radically sub-optimizes the possibilities of Open Space, simply because it reduces the diversity of the conversation pool. And yes I too love to sit with one or two "good buddies" (new or old) -- but my constant experience is that the odd, wayward, interloper (butterfly) usually adds spice to the occasion. Of course it sometimes ends it too -- and the two feet take over. However the novelty of a new face, mind, point of view is almost inevitably a positive (except when it isn't).

There is one point on which I really must (I think) take issue with you. You said, "AND --- All of this occurs "outside" of the formal process and form of OST. "Butterfly-ness" is acknowledged by the process, and held by the form of OST.  But it is not the practice-normed form of OST which is essentially --gatherings around publicly advertised topics and conveners in specific places at specific times." Actually I would see "butterfly-ness" as the essence of Open Space and all the rest as a practical accommodation to the needs of some (many) people for a specific time, place, and topic. Of course the "time" is a movable feast (starts when it starts) and the topic seems to mutate, and even the "place" can be a sometime thing. In the very best of Open Spaces (vibrant, alive, fiercely productive, fun, frivolous, and seriously engaging) in my experience, the minimal structure of time/place/topic/ participants breaks down completely and everything is in a constant flow-state. It is all butterflies! So maybe the "practice-normed form of OST" is simply practice and preparation for that wonderful moment when we all learn to fly. Now THAT would be "advanced Butterfly Behavior!"

Harrison 

Harrison Owen
7808 River Falls Dr.
Potomac, MD  20854
USA
301-365-2093
207-763-3261 (summer)
website www.openspaceworld.com

Personal Website www.ho-image.com

----- Original Message ----- 

From: Mark R. Jones <mailto:mark.r.jones at sunyata.ws>  

To: Harrison <mailto:hhowen at verizon.net>  Owen ; OSLIST <mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU>  

Sent: Tuesday, August 15, 2006 1:00 PM

Subject: Re: Advanced Butterfly Behavior

Hi H (Harrison) and Peggy.

Hmmmmmmmmmm . . .

There is an element here for me that is implied in Peggy's
piece and your response to it that I would like to explore . . .

The "butterfly" phenomena in OST has been widely acknowledged
by you and others.  As a dedicated "butterfly" myself, I find
that I do have some reflections on the topic that Peggy has raised.

In my "butterfly-ness", I assemble, attract, and/or am attracted
to people with which I typically have very intense, personal, and
private conversations with.  These conversations occur in both 1:1
and group forms. H, over the years, you and I have had these types 
of interactions with each other -- in the midst of OS events.

In my "butterfly-ness", I discern  who I want to be in conversation 
with -- The Law of Two Feet -- and then act upon that discernment. 
As you know H, I rarely actually attend "called" (posted) sessions.

Yet, I feel welcome to play in Open Space -- not negatively judged 
for my discernment -- my exercise of The Law of Two Feet.

In my "butterfly-ness", I learn to hear, see, and love other people.
And perhaps others learn to hear, see, and love me and each other.
I acquire and refine insights and discover connections.  

Unfortunately, I rarely document my learnings within the formal 
mechanisms of OST.  And my "public" sharings do not contain the 
richness of the private details that I have discovered.

Yet, I feel that there is some common good that comes of it.
Some mutual sense of interconnection, compassion, and understanding
is established.  Some of the insights are returned to the public
forum. And, interpersonal relationships are established and/or
reinforced.

AND --- All of this occurs "outside" of the formal process and form
of OST.  "Butterfly-ness" is acknowledged by the process, and held 
by the form of OST.  But it is not the practice-normed form of OST
which is essentially -- gatherings around publicly advertised topics 
and conveners in specific places at specific times.

If in the two examples that Peggy gave, the participants had simply
"butterflyed" their intention to meet together -- there would have 
been no public declaration and no public outrage and judgment, and
possibly no public sharing.  The "sessions" would have occurred outside
of the formal process and form of OST.  

But I suspect that the session participants chose to try to in some way 
to "honor" the formal process and form of OST by attempting to use some 
of the OST mechanisms of "public" declaration.  This partial revelation 
of intent created a public stir regarding what was in all likelihood 
a space in which very personal and private conversations could occur.

Peggy's inquiry provokes me to ponder: 
 * What ways does and can the formal process and form of OST more deeply
   embrace and benefit from "butterfly-ness"?
 * Does the formal process and form of OST fundamentally reject "private"
   conversation and its manifestation in some forms of "butterfly-ness"?
 * Is the manifestation of some forms of "butterfly-ness" as "private"
   conversation a perversion of OST?
 * Is acting upon "The Law of Two Feet" as a means of interpersonal
   relationship discernment a perversion of OST?
 * In the cultural norms of OST, am I required to give up my practice
   of choosing who I want to interact with?

Mark R. Jones
Chief Executive Officer
The Sunyata Group
The Integral Wellness Group
----------------------------------------------------------------------
PO Box 58788
Renton, Washington
USA 98058-1788
Phone:      425-413-6000
e-Mail:      mark.r.jones at sunyata.ws 
----------------------------------------------------------------------

  _____  

From: Harrison Owen <hhowen at adelphia.net>
Reply-To: Harrison Owen <hhowen at verizon.net>
Date: Tue, 15 Aug 2006 08:13:27 -0400
To: <OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU>
Subject: Re: Advanced Butterfly Behavior

I am not sure that I would see such occurrences as "advanced butterfly behavior. Narrow minded and shortsighted come to mind. Folks will do what they will do -- and whatever happens is the only thing that could have. . . but I really think that the conveners of such groups are short-changing themselves and all those who come to the session (and maybe all those who don't, as well). By arbitrarily restricting the diversity of the group the potential for new and deeper thought/experience is radically reduced. I must also confess to a certain abhorrence to terms like "culturally mature" -- and even more with those who think they could make such a determination. I am reminded of the situation at the recent OS for Imams and Rabbis. As it happened there were several young students present including a delightful 19 year old lady from Indonesia. On the face of it, I doubt she would have made anybody's list as "culturally mature." And given her natural modesty I am sure that she would never have made the association for herself. But the fact of the matter is that her natural charm, intelligence and curiosity made her in my eyes (and for others as well) one of the real stars of the gathering. If nothing else, she was willing to ask questions that everybody else was assiduously avoiding. Would I do anything to stop such segregated gatherings? No -- but I guess I would hope that part of the learning curve for the Culturally Mature was coming to see that there are really better ways than hiding out in a room, talking to each other.

Harrison

Harrison Owen
7808 River Falls Dr.
Potomac, MD  20854
USA
301-365-2093
207-763-3261 (summer)
website www.openspaceworld.com  <http://www.openspaceworld.com> <http://www.openspaceworld.com> 
Personal Website www.ho-image.com  <http://www.ho-image.com> <http://www.ho-image.com> 

----- Original Message ----- 

From:  Peggy Holman  <mailto:peggy at opencirclecompany.com> <mailto:peggy at opencirclecompany.com>  

To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU  

Sent: Monday, August 14, 2006 8:26  PM

Subject: Advanced Butterfly Behavior

As I mentioned in my  last e-mail, now that I�m back after about a year away from the OS list, I�ve  got a variety of questions, stories and learnings to share over the next few  weeks.  This question popped to  the top of my list.

There is a situation  that I have now experienced twice in long OS gatherings with many experienced  OSers.  It is a dynamic that has an important and potentially dissonant  energy.  I'm wondering if others have encountered this and what their  thoughts are on it.  My suspicion is that we'll see more of it as more  people attend longer OS gatherings and generally develop more experience with  OS.

My hunch is that this is  a phenomenon that deserves a name, much like bumblebees and butterflies.

So, with that preamble,  here's the description and two specific examples:

There's a session that  emerges from what is happening in the mix.  The convenor(s) have some  very specific people they wish to meet with and aren't interested in having it  open to whoever wanders in.  It is similar to what happens when  butterflies meet but because there is more intentionality and potentially  larger numbers, it is its own thing.

Two  examples:

At the April  Evolutionary Salon:

We had an expert in a  process who was willing to do a session but he felt that his work required a  targeted group (in his terms, the "culturally mature").  We were  interested in experiencing this and quietly put the word out to the people we  wanted in the room.  When others also came, they were  welcomed.

At the Practice of Peace  in 2003 and in her words:

On the last day of the  conference, I woke up with a clarity of what I should do if I really cared to  take this rare, international opportunity one step further into the  future.  I saw a session with  specific people (very engaged and personally interested, committed to the  theme I was passionate to explore, with very "concentrated energy" that I felt  was essential for a breakthrough in clarity and identifying what was  next.)  

She was fine if others  appeared  but did not wish to  announce the session.  She pulled the post-it for the space from the  time/space grid and then quietly put out the word to the people she  had in mind.  Some of them came to the session and others chose to  go to other sessions. A few others appeared during the session and were  welcomed.  She created a session report an hour after the session was over. She had  intended to talk about the session and the  experimentation during the closing circle.  (For a variety of  unrelated reasons, that closing circle never quite happened, so this became  painful unfinished business for her.)In both cases, there was  some reflection by the hosts after the OS completed.  Some saw the  sessions as fine, appropriate butterfly behavior.  Others were disturbed  by the lack of transparency, feeling that it was a drag on the energy  field.

I am reflecting that as  participants become very mature, posting such sessions, complete with a  mindful request about who comes is an ideal for this; also VERY challenging to  do!

Thoughts?

Peggy

_____________________________
Peggy  Holman
The Open Circle Company
15347 SE 49th Place
Bellevue, WA   98006
(425) 746-6274 

www.opencirclecompany.com  <http://www.opencirclecompany.com> <http://www.opencirclecompany.com> 

For pre-orders with a 20% discount on the new edition of  The Change Handbook, go to: 
www.bkconnection.com/ChangeHandbook  <http://www.bkconnection.com/ChangeHandbook> <http://www.bkconnection.com/ChangeHandbook>  

"An angel told me that the only way to step into the fire  and not get burnt, is to become 
the fire".
  -- Drew  Dellinger
* *  ==========================================================  OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU ------------------------------ To subscribe,  unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of  oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:   http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html <http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html>  To learn about  OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs: http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist 
* * ========================================================== OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs: http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist

* * ========================================================== OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU ------------------------------ To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu: http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs: http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist 

-- 
Love rays,
Tree Fitzpatrick

. . . the great and incalculable grace of love, which says, with Augustine, "I want you to be," without being able to give any particular reason for such supreme and unsurpassable affirmation.  -- Hannah Arendt 

*
*
==========================================================
OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
------------------------------
To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options,
view the archives of oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:
http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html

To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:
http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <http://lists.openspacetech.org/pipermail/oslist-openspacetech.org/attachments/20060816/b1ca6aeb/attachment-0016.htm>