Strugglelessness

Fri Aug 12 05:40:38 PDT 2005

What a wonderful exploration.  I have chosen to make friends with the word
struggle and find very little need to use it in my language any more.  As I
learn at deeper and deeper levels what being is.

I could hear from John Engle's post the underlying desire of his very
trembling heart as he looks around Haiti - a land John has learned to love
and call home.  My son, Scott, lived in Sri Lanka doing a project and I
heard his trembling heart.  I, too, have felt that tremble.  I feel that
heart in Lisa Heft in her work and many others here.  I saw that heart in
Filiz as she fearlessly agreed to step into the circle at OSonOS 2005 and
open space for a non-convergence in an "oral" tradition.  I've been
privileged to work in many parts of the world in human rights and peace
initiatives.  And, yes, even restorative justice initiatives in prisons.  I
left the work I was doing in human rights several years ago as aggression
breeds agression -- period, and I realized I was feeling agressive more than
anything else.  Funny thing how pushing attracts that push back.

What I am coming to learn is that I cannot be poor enough to help the poor,
sick enough to help the sick, etc.  By learning to hold space anywhere I
am -- bringing my mindfulness practice off the meditation cushion and into
each moment -- I bring myself more fully to the world.  In quantum physics,
energy flows where attention goes -- I choose to focus my attention, as much
as possible, on what is working.  To bring my vitality and essence to the
situation and hold that space for others. It is a learning process for me to
sit in a circle where mothers' have no food for their children and to bring
my heart fully -- holding the compassion, hope, grief, and possibilities and
potential all at the same time.  To honor and love situations and people
where they are.  To have the humility to listen fully, to invite the problem
to speak to itself.  To notice what happens in myself when returning to my
amazingly luxurious life in a peaceful place -- surrounded by flowers and
trees, birds, and fresh water.

It is those challenging times of practicing "whatever happens is the only
thing that could" or "everything is perfect in itself" or "surely the
presence of God is in this moment" -- that become the greatest gifts.  I
notice that funerals are one of the most amazing places to be as people,
families, all relax their grudges for a while.

So -- rather than struggling, what is possible when I become friendly with
each moment, when I truly extend the energy of welcome to each and every
situation?  If I choose struggle as my "houseguest" today -- I can simply
choose to notice, breath deeply and open more space in my heart -- pet the
dog -- and ask for the jewel to reveal itself as I befriend and welcome the
situation I'm struggling with.  What I find there is an inspired action.
The emotional journey is always necessary before or in collaboration with
the action journey -- and both are sweet.

Thank you, again, great hearts of the OSList,

Judi in Heavenfax!

-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU]On Behalf Of Karen
Sella
Sent: Thursday, August 11, 2005 5:28 PM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: FW: powerful poem! help me understand it.

Greetings All,

A quick thought regarding the banishment of "struggle"... maybe the use
in the poem (beautiful, thank you, Kairi, for sharing it!) refers more
to the violent, oppositional aspects of struggle and less to the more
common use of the word to describe persistence in the face of great
difficulty?

Vi 1: to make strenuous or violent efforts against opposition: CONTEND
2: to proceed with great difficulty or with great effort

N 1: CONTEST: STRIFE 2: a violent effort or exertion: an act of strongly
motivated striving

Warm regards,
Karen

Karen Sella
www.luminacoaching.com
206.780.2998

-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of john
engle
Sent: Thursday, August 11, 2005 12:17 PM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: powerful poem! help me understand it.

hi brendan, kairi and others.

i've never opened space in a prison but i have participated in a
touchstones
discussion (http://touchstones.org) with about 25 men serving life
sentences. the discussion centered around "power" and not surprisingly,
i
learned a great deal.

great that you are doing this! i look forward to following developments
as
you work toward opening space in prisons.

on another subject, kairi, thank you for sharing that poem in your
message.
i love it! and, i loved being at OSonOS! Judi, you and your team did a
great
job at receiving us and making us feel at home.

while i love the spirit of the poem, i just don't know what to do with
"banish the word struggle from your vocabulary." how do others see this?

removing the word struggle from MY vocabulary seems like it could have
some
positive outcomes. at the same time, it's hard for me to think of a
better
word that describes daily life for so many people. and, not
acknowledging
this seems like i might be missing something as i work with folks in
circumstances so much different from my own.

i'm in haiti as i write and catching up with friends and colleagues.
there
are at least hundreds of thousands of people here--some estimate in the
millions--that don't consume a meal each day. and when they do, they
don't
know when they'll eat next. i can't begin to imagine what living with so

much uncertainty and discomfort must be like. and i've also learned that
far
too often we who live in financially prosperous countries romance
poverty,
saying that poor people are happier.

it serves us (people who live in financially prosperous countries) well
to
see things this way and it pains me when i have US American visitors
with me
in Haiti and conclude after a week here that the people are "so happy."
in
many cultures, those in the southern countries included, it is
appropriate
to put one's best face forward especially when meeting visitors. those
same
Haitians who looked so happy to the visitor might be totally stressed
out
because they're worrying about how they're going to pay school fees for
their kids and get a meal together, etc. when they speak in their own
language to me, "struggle" projects from their facial expressions, body
movement and words.

i would not feel comfortable asking folks who live such realities to
remove
"struggle" from their vocabulary.

thanks for your patience as i vent and live emotions connected to being
with
friends in extremely difficult situations.

john

http://JohnEngle.net
email: john at johnengle.net
P.O. Box 337
Hershey, Pennsylvania 17033
tel. 202-236-6532

>From: Brendan McKeague <mckeague at iprimus.com.au>
>Reply-To: OSLIST <OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU>
>To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
>Subject: Re: There is a river flowing now very fast
>Date: Thu, 11 Aug 2005 08:26:54 +0800
>
>
>"Banish the word 'struggle' from your attitude and your vocabulary.
>All that we do now must be done in a sacred manner and in celebration.
>aahhh....thank you so much Kairi
>
>What a moment to receive this gift - the start of a brand new
>day...beautiful and inspiring...today I will let go a wee bit more...
>I am about to depart for  a day's 'space-making' in a maximum security
>prison with long-term offenders..
>I will be present and holding space with individual men - my dream is
that
>one day there may be more collective open space within such
confinement...
>.
>Anyone ever opened space in a prison?
>
>peace to all
>Brendan
>
>*
>*
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