Giving and receiving

[Julie Smith]

Hi Doug,

My response to people who asked about fees was always a bit
fumbly-bumbly because our culture and our language do not really support
what I was trying to get at, and usually went something like this:

"I do this work because I care about people, I care about kids, and I
care about our community. Families who are going through divorce are
almost always suffering. I know something about that suffering, and I
also know some ways to lessen that suffering. When asked, I'm willing to
try to help.

It feels wrong to me to charge people for helping them.

It feels right to me to offer help simply because help is what is
needed.

I am not financially independent.  I also have a family.  I also have
bills to pay.  If it feels right for you to pay me, that would be
appreciated.  Please pay whatever amount feels right to you.  I also
appreciate any other choice you might make."

Like I said, fumbly-bumbly.  (With apologies to everyone out there
trying to translate this into another language...... hmmmmmmm...... try
disjointed, unclear, vague, incomplete.....)

The part I never said is underneath all of that..... I don't have the
words.  Perhaps someone will help me.

Julie

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