conflict resolution (branching off from self organization...)

zken zken at cwo.com
Mon Dec 31 07:07:26 PST 2001


In conflict, for me, I want each person to be able to tell their whole
story, without interruption, and to be heard with compassion.  First I ask
them to tell me the story alone,  Let it crock pot (Simmer) for a few days
and then share it with the other.  I want nothing in the room but chairs, no
place to hide and nothing to get behind.

Yes, OS is in many ways the essence of conflict resolution (my practice) as
in OS a person takes responsibility and passion and is implicitly given the
honor of a full listening.  No two people are in a conflict it is the
community as well. The process allows for and invites the participants to
consider how to heal the community.  I think when I am most successful the
process works on a spiral with Macro and Micro weaving and separating.
Dynamic processes invite/require open space.

K e n
Peace is Security

-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU]On Behalf Of Chris
Weaver
Sent: Sunday, December 30, 2001 8:17 AM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: conflict resolution (branching off from self organization...)

Julie wrote,
I wonder whether there are some important lessons for conflict resolution
professionals in the work you're doing.  I think the answer is yes, but I
haven't quite figured out what the lessons are.

Not knowing much about the profession of conflict resolution, I expect that
there is a lot of resonance.

I imagine that there are many mediators who see themselves as space-holders
rather than fixers.

I imagine that there are mediators who in some way invite those "in
conflict" to consider a larger circle of viewpoints by holding space for a
diversity of voices - not just the polarized "other" but a circle of those
affected and those who care.

My friend does victim-offender mediation, sometimes in the aftermath of
violent crime.  There is much in common about how he and I prepare for our
work, but to me his space-holding requires more courage - warrior energy,
tested tried & true.  And an unwavering trust in & service to the
transforming power of love.

Interesting though...when I think of "conflict resolution" I picture two
people across a table from one another, with a mediator in between, and I
think, what a set-up.  How could there be healing without the circle?  How
could healing be sustained without a circle of "the right people," who have
responded to an open invitation?  And what would be the theme?

Thanks, Julie...I find a great deal to think about here.

Chris




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