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</o:shapelayout></xml><![endif]--></head><body bgcolor=white lang=EN-US link=blue vlink=purple><div class=WordSection1><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Harold – Beautifully said! I think the heart of the matter may be that Open Space is effectively a training program for life. All of life, including the beginnings, middles, and end. Birth and death, and everything in between. I guess what I have particularly enjoyed about good old OST is its stealth character – a modern Trojan Horse. People think they are simply going to do a “Meeting Management Process” – but it fools them into experiencing life in its fullness. Nice joke! I wish I could have thought of it, but truth to tell, I was fooled along with everybody else.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Harrison<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Harrison Owen<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>7808 River Falls Dr.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Potomac, MD 20854<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>USA<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>189 Beaucaire Ave. (summer)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Camden, Maine 20854<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Phone 301-365-2093<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>(summer) 207-763-3261<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><a href="www.openspaceworld.com%20"><span style='color:blue'>www.openspaceworld.com</span></a> <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><a href="www.ho-image.com%20"><span style='color:blue'>www.ho-image.com</span></a> (Personal Website)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Consolas;color:#1F497D'>To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of OSLIST Go to:<a href="http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org"><span style='color:blue'>http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org</span></a><o:p></o:p></span></p></div><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><o:p> </o:p></span></p><div><div style='border:none;border-top:solid #B5C4DF 1.0pt;padding:3.0pt 0in 0in 0in'><p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Tahoma","sans-serif";color:windowtext'>From:</span></b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Tahoma","sans-serif";color:windowtext'> oslist-bounces@lists.openspacetech.org [mailto:oslist-bounces@lists.openspacetech.org] <b>On Behalf Of </b>Harold Shinsato<br><b>Sent:</b> Monday, December 03, 2012 6:33 PM<br><b>To:</b> World wide Open Space Technology email list<br><b>Subject:</b> Re: [OSList] The Joys of Grief -- With Thanks to Harold<o:p></o:p></span></p></div></div><p class=MsoNormal><o:p> </o:p></p><div><p class=MsoNormal>Thanks so much for such a personal and poignant story, Suzanne - and Happy belated Birthday to you, Harrison (and to your dad, Suzanne).<br><br>A midwife helps usher the birth process, and a hospice worker assists the with the process of dying.<br><br>Open Space has very much been about both at the same time - which also makes it hard to talk about.<br><br>Birth usually comes with quite a bit of pain - we recognize that but gloss over it for the obvious joy of welcoming in a new soul - never mind the postpartum depression.<br><br>Death often comes with pain as well especially for those who are losing a loved one, but I've been surprised by the joy that comes from celebrating a life.<br><br>These are heavy things - not necessarily the best marketing material to invite people into something. And at the same time, it touches on why Open Space is so potent. It's touching on a very natural transformational process of both beginnings and endings. There's a deep awareness of structure in Open Space, even as we witness new structure coming into being to serve Spirit, just as we witness it leaving.<br><br>My original intention for diving into Open Space was to promote new stuff. Agile Software Development. Lean. Even OST itself. What I haven't felt nearly as joyful about has been how much OST is also about grieving and letting go of the old stories. The memories. It's continues to be something worthy of pondering - and I'm grateful that Harrison wrote Wave Rider. And it still feels like there's more, much more.<br><br>How do you keep facing and helping these forces to flower as an Open Space facilitator - or as someone inviting others in? How do you face the fear - and keep the courage both for yourself, and for others?<br><br> Thanks,<br> Harold<br><br>P.S. This quote seems relevant.<br><br><i>A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines. With consistency a great soul has simply nothing to do. He may as well concern himself with his shadow on the wall. Speak what you think now in hard words, and to-morrow speak what to-morrow thinks in hard words again, though it contradict every thing you said to-day. — 'Ah, so you shall be sure to be misunderstood.' — Is it so bad, then, to be misunderstood? Pythagoras was misunderstood, and Socrates, and Jesus, and Luther, and Copernicus, and Galileo, and Newton, and every pure and wise spirit that ever took flesh. To be great is to be misunderstood.</i><br><br> - Ralph Waldo Emerson<br><br><br>On 12/3/12 12:47 PM, Harrison Owen wrote:<o:p></o:p></p></div><blockquote style='margin-top:5.0pt;margin-bottom:5.0pt'><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Thanks Suzanne – and a special thanks to your father, without whom you would not be. </span><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:Wingdings;color:#1F497D'>J</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'> </span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>ho</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'> </span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Harrison Owen</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>7808 River Falls Dr.</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Potomac, MD 20854</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>USA</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'> </span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>189 Beaucaire Ave. (summer)</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Camden, Maine 20854</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'> </span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>Phone 301-365-2093</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'>(summer) 207-763-3261</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'> </span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><a href="www.openspaceworld.com%20">www.openspaceworld.com</a> </span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'><a href="www.ho-image.com%20">www.ho-image.com</a> (Personal Website)</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:10.5pt;font-family:Consolas;color:#1F497D'>To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of OSLIST Go to:<a href="http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org">http://lists.openspacetech.org/listinfo.cgi/oslist-openspacetech.org</a></span><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal><span style='font-size:11.0pt;font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif";color:#1F497D'> </span><o:p></o:p></p><div style='border:none;border-top:solid #B5C4DF 1.0pt;padding:3.0pt 0in 0in 0in'><p class=MsoNormal><b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Tahoma","sans-serif"'>From:</span></b><span style='font-size:10.0pt;font-family:"Tahoma","sans-serif"'> <a href="mailto:oslist-bounces@lists.openspacetech.org">oslist-bounces@lists.openspacetech.org</a> [<a href="mailto:oslist-bounces@lists.openspacetech.org">mailto:oslist-bounces@lists.openspacetech.org</a>] <b>On Behalf Of </b>Suzanne Daigle<br><b>Sent:</b> Sunday, December 02, 2012 2:22 PM<br><b>To:</b> World wide Open Space Technology email list<br><b>Subject:</b> Re: [OSList] The Joys of Grief -- With Thanks to Harold</span><o:p></o:p></p></div><p class=MsoNormal> <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>A special Happy Birthday wish with a story that says: “Don’t judge a book by its cover!”<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>December 2<sup>nd</sup> is a special day for someone we know. It’s Harrison’s birthday and we are all very grateful that he popped into this world on this little ole planet of ours, if only to remind us all how wonderfully precious life is and how much there is to enjoy in the doing and non-doing, moment by moment, in wonder and in awe of it all. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Open Space Technology has been a great gift to so many, opening up spaces inside ourselves and with others, spaces where people can come together to make a difference – in our families, our communities, in countries and in the world. Unbelievable what happens by simply sitting in a circle, united on something we care about, with a law and a few principles which are really just the laws of nature and life! Magic happens every time. The experience is unique and predictable, joyous and intense, always generative, purposeful and creative. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>No gift big enough, no birthday wish loud enough to express the gratitude we feel for this great life gift that Open Space has been for all of us around the world.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>So on this anniversary date, a day when we want to say a heartfelt Happy Birthday to our dear friend Harrison, I offer this paying it forward Birthday Story as a gift hoping it will invite a “ heartfelt conversation” that people can have with their dads not even waiting for a birthday day – a conversation I can now only have in spirit. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Many of you know this already because I have spoken of this coincidence before. <b>My late father and Harrison share the same birthdate</b> and same penchant for gin martinis. Before he died, my French Canadian dad read <u>A User Guide to Open Space Technology</u> in Italian, a language that he had been teaching himself. He loved the book and we had some good chats and quite a few arguments about it too.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Today something happened; a bit of synchronicity that brings a touch of sadness and joy to my day. It’s something I wanted to share with all of you knowing that in the vulnerability of my story, it may bring you closer to people in your life. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>About 8 to 10 years ago, my dad sent me a book titled: <b><u>Machiavelli for Women</u> </b>by Harriet Rubin. Wikipedia describes <b>Machiavellianism</b> (or <b>machiavellian mask</b>) is, according to the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxford_English_Dictionary" title="Oxford English Dictionary"><span style='color:windowtext;text-decoration:none'>Oxford English Dictionary</span></a>, "the employment of cunning and <a href="http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/duplicity" title="wikt:duplicity"><span style='color:windowtext;text-decoration:none'>duplicity</span></a> in statecraft or in general conduct", deriving from the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Italian_Renaissance" title="Italian Renaissance"><span style='color:windowtext;text-decoration:none'>Italian Renaissance</span></a> diplomat and writer <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Niccol%C3%B2_Machiavelli" title="Niccolò Machiavelli"><span style='color:windowtext;text-decoration:none'>Niccolò Machiavelli</span></a>, who wrote <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Prince" title="The
Prince"><span style='color:windowtext;text-decoration:none'>Il Principe</span></a> (The Prince) and other works. The word has a similar use in modern <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychology" title=Psychology><span style='color:windowtext;text-decoration:none'>psychology</span></a> where it describes one of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dark_triad" title="Dark
triad"><span style='color:windowtext;text-decoration:none'>dark triad</span></a> personalities, characterised by a duplicitous interpersonal style associated with <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cynicism_%28contemporary%29" title="Cynicism (contemporary)"><span style='color:windowtext;text-decoration:none'>cynical</span></a> beliefs and pragmatic morality.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>I was hurt when I got this book in the mail from dad. I did not read it or even mention a word about it; simply stuffed it in the back of a giant bookshelf in my garage<b>. I should have known to never judge a book by its cover. </b><o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'> Like many children I had a conflicted relationship with my dad. As a medical doctor who loved science and his profession, he found little use for the mega corporations of this world. In his eyes, they were the arch enemy. Working in manufacturing and corporate leadership, I often felt that I bore the brunt of all that was wrong with corporate politics, that I myself was too manipulatory, too nice and too controlling – the stuff that I then felt was good leadership and management. Dad often felt outrage at what he saw and so often, he wanted me to join his fight if only in words. It was not my way. And yet, I shared his views on many issues while still seeing the great stuff that happens in the workplace. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>When Open Space came into my life, it was a veritable tsunami, hugely transformative, painful at times though more often joyful. It also got me a relationship with my dad. I can only imagine the conversations we would have today as I step into a bigger calling of leadership with others more and more. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>So the point of my story is that this book was not an endorsement of Machiavellian ways, it was an acknowledgement by my dad of the high regard he had for me and what he saw was possible when women and others step into their leadership, one that is not about war and power, fighting and winning. Quite the contrary. The stories, the quotes, the leaders are inspiring in the way of the Open Space work that we do. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>On this special birthday day, I quote this passage on page 20 from Harriet Rubin’s book that came from Nelson Mandela’s inaugural speech which I interpret was also my dad’s message to me and the message that Harrison conveys to us in this community, time and time again:<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, our darkness, that most frighten us. We ask ourselves, “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually who are you not to be?... Your playing small does not serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.”<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>In closing, I add this last tidbit. After reading the first few chapters of this fateful book, I started fanning the pages, stopping when I suddenly recognized my dad’s handwriting. Under the chapter heading “<u>On the use of Men as Weapons</u>”, my father had scrawled these words in brackets <b>(Except your dad).</b> It was the only page on which he had written anything. Needless to say, tears poured down my face. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>And in the end, on this special birthday day, I know it’s the universe telling me and us once again to be opening space everywhere and anywhere, all the time! Otherwise, we will be limited to judging a book by its cover, never knowing the greatness of others and what we can do together. <o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>So Harrison, expect a Birthday Hug in Florida at WOSonOS 2013 if I don't see you before then.<o:p></o:p></p><p class=MsoNormal style='mso-margin-top-alt:auto;mso-margin-bottom-alt:auto'>Suzanne<o:p></o:p></p><div><p class=MsoNormal style='margin-bottom:12.0pt'> <o:p></o:p></p></div></blockquote><p class=MsoNormal style='margin-bottom:12.0pt'><o:p> </o:p></p><div><p class=MsoNormal>-- <br>Harold Shinsato<br><a href="mailto:harold@shinsato.com">harold@shinsato.com</a><br><a href="http://shinsato.com">http://shinsato.com</a><br>twitter: <a href="http://twitter.com/hajush">@hajush</a><o:p></o:p></p></div></div></body></html>