The temptation to mediate is real and valid. We just need to be mindful of the context of our intervention, whether the intervention is quiet holding the space or overt mediation. For me, it's asking myself if I'm coming from a place of faith in the people or a place of non-faith. The context of my actions are therefore more significant than the content of my actions. This also goes for the temptation I might feel to think I could know best who should and shouldn't be a member of a community.
<br><br>Jack<br><br><div><span class="gmail_quote">On 2/15/07, <b class="gmail_sendername">Bui K. Petersen</b> <<a href="mailto:bui@buildconsensus.ca">bui@buildconsensus.ca</a>> wrote:</span><blockquote class="gmail_quote" style="border-left: 1px solid rgb(204, 204, 204); margin: 0pt 0pt 0pt 0.8ex; padding-left: 1ex;">
<div bgcolor="#ffffff" text="#000000">
This is what I was afraid of. I think is a situation where mediation
would be more effective. In conflict resolution we often say "all
behaviour makes sense". Empathy and compassion is usually more
effective than a 2X4.<br>
<br>
I want to add that the scenario I am thinking is not when the person in
question is a boss but more like a regular member of a community. It
would be unfortunate if someone chose to leave a community as a result
of an OS event. But perhaps there are other perspectives out there.<br>
<br>
Búi<br>
<br>
Harrison Owen wrote:
<blockquote cite="http://mid001101c75145$01c7c0d0$6400a8c0@harrison" type="cite">
<div>
<p><font color="black" face="Times New Roman" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">"I wonder how empowering it is
for the
individual left behind?"<br>
<br>
</span></font></p>
<p><font color="red" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial; color: red;"> </span></font></p>
<p><font color="red" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial; color: red;">Well, if that
"difficult"
person was a command and control boss – it is possible, though perhaps
not likely, that he will learn something. Then again, he might go and
seek
alternative employment. Or – all those folks he was intimidating might
do
the same thing. Sometimes the universe has to hit you on the side of
the head
with a 2X4 just to get your attention. Painful, but effective.</span></font></p>
<p><font color="red" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial; color: red;"> </span></font></p>
<p><font color="red" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial; color: red;">Harrison</span></font></p>
<p><font color="red" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial; color: red;"> </span></font></p>
<div>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;">Harrison Owen</span></font></p>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;">7808 River Falls Drive</span></font></p>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;">Potomac, Maryland 20854</span></font></p>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;">Phone </span></font><font face="Arial" size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;">
301-365-2093</span></font></p>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Arial;">Skype hhowen</span></font></p>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial;">Open Space Training</span></font>
<a href="http://www.openspaceworld.com/" target="_blank" onclick="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-family: Arial;">www.openspaceworld.com</span></font></a> </p>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial;">Open Space Institute</span></font>
<a href="http://www.openspaceworld.org/" target="_blank" onclick="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-family: Arial;">www.openspaceworld.org</span></font></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial;">Personal website</span></font>
<a href="http://www.ho-image.com/" target="_blank" onclick="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-family: Arial;">www.ho-image.com</span></font></a>
</p>
<p style="text-align: center;" align="center"><font color="black" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial;">OSLIST</span></font><font face="Arial"><span style="font-family: Arial;">: To subscribe,
unsubscribe, change
your options, view the archives Visit: </span></font><a href="http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html" target="_blank" onclick="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)"><font face="Arial"><span style="font-family: Arial;">
www.listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html</span></font></a></p>
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<p><font color="red" face="Arial" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt; font-family: Arial; color: red;"> </span></font></p>
<p style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><font color="black" face="Tahoma" size="2"><span style="font-size: 10pt; font-family: Tahoma; color: windowtext;">-----Original
Message-----<br>
<b><span style="font-weight: bold;">From:</span></b> OSLIST
[<a href="mailto:OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU" target="_blank" onclick="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)">mailto:OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU</a>] <b><span style="font-weight: bold;">On
Behalf Of </span></b>Bui K. Petersen<br>
<b><span style="font-weight: bold;">Sent:</span></b> Thursday,
February 15, 2007
2:31 PM<br>
<b><span style="font-weight: bold;">To:</span></b>
<a href="mailto:OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU" target="_blank" onclick="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)">OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU</a><br>
<b><span style="font-weight: bold;">Subject:</span></b> Re: Law of
Two Feet</span></font></p>
<p style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><font color="black" face="Times New Roman" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt;"> </span></font></p>
<p style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><font color="black" face="Times New Roman" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">Thanks
for the
reassurance, Jack.<br>
<br>
However, I am not as concerned about the to the topic and the
conversation as I
am with the affect on the "difficult" individual. While it may be
empowering for people to simply leave an unfruitful conversation, I
wonder how
empowering it is for the individual left behind?<br>
<br>
Búi<br>
<br>
Jack Ricchiuto wrote: </span></font></p>
<p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-left: 0.5in;"><font color="black" face="Times New Roman" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">Bui,<br>
<br>
This does happen and can hurt the development of content around an
otherwise
attractive topic. If the self-organizing soil of the group is fertile
enough,
people will continue the conversation in different places and in
different
ways, the way water will flow around rocks to whatever openings
available. When
people with passion are given freedom, good things happen no matter
what. <br>
<br>
Translation: not to worry.<br>
<br>
Be well,<br>
<br>
Jack</span></font></p>
<div>
<p style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><span><font color="black" face="Times New Roman" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">On
2/15/07, <b><span style="font-weight: bold;">Bui K. Petersen</span></b>
<<a href="mailto:bui@buildconsensus.ca" target="_blank" onclick="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)">bui@buildconsensus.ca </a>>
wrote:</span></font></span>
</p>
<div bgcolor="#ffffff" text="#000000">
<p style="margin-right: 0in; margin-bottom: 12pt; margin-left: 0.5in;"><font color="black" face="Times New Roman" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">As someone who is still just learning and
trying to find out how and
when OST can be used, I am curious about people's experience with the
effect
the Law of Two Feet can have on irritating dominating personalities.
Say for
example that someone is dominating a group and practically annoying
everyone
else with the result of them using their two feet and leaving. How does
this
affect the person left behind? I have some concerns about what could
happen to
this person but before I mention them, I am interested to hear what
others have
experienced.<br>
<br>
Curious!<br>
<br>
Búi<br>
<br>
</span></font></p>
<div>
<p style="margin-left: 0.5in;"><font color="black" face="Times New Roman" size="3"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">-- </span></font></p>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</blockquote>
<br>
<div>-- <br>
<p><font face="Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" size="-1"><strong>Búi K.
Petersen,</strong> <em>Cert. ConRes.</em><br>
mediator and facilitator</font><br>
-------------------------------- <br>
<b><font color="#cc6600" face="Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" size="+1">c.solutions</font></b>
<font face="Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" size="-1"><br>
Vancouver, B.C. Canada </font><br>
<font face="Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif" size="-1"> Phone: 604.724.4954<br>
Web: <a href="http://www.buildconsensus.ca" target="_blank" onclick="return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)">www.buildconsensus.ca</a><br>
</font></p>
</div>
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</blockquote></div><br><br clear="all"><br>-- <br>Jack Ricchiuto<br>Leadership coach, facilitator, author<br><br>Just Released! "Mountain Paths: A Guide on the Journey toward Discovering our Potential" - available at
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