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<TITLE>Re: [OSLIST] the right to treat each other well (long response)</TITLE>
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Glory,<BR>
<BR>
Thank you for:<BR>
<FONT COLOR="#008000">"The more power, the more vulnerability"<BR>
</FONT>which to me suggests that an ethic, or spirituality, of vulnerability is at the heart of transformative power...<BR>
and also for:<BR>
<FONT COLOR="#008000">"response-ability"<BR>
</FONT>...what a useful & evocative turn-of-phrase!<BR>
and also for:<BR>
the report about your story circle.<BR>
<BR>
Blessings,<BR>
Chris<BR>
<BR>
----------<BR>
>From: Glory Ressler <on.the.edge@sympatico.ca><BR>
>To: OSLIST@LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU<BR>
>Subject: Re: [OSLIST] the right to treat each other well (long response)<BR>
>Date: Thu, Oct 18, 2001, 10:45 AM<BR>
><BR>
<BR>
> Alan,<BR>
> Thank you for your post on this subject. Beware my response is long -<BR>
> let it be a testimony to the richness of your original sharing!<BR>
> I found it very thought-provoking and concur with you, especially:<BR>
>>How much of the richness of life is enhanced, individually and<BR>
> collectively, every time each of us moves towards another as a<BR>
> fundamental way of being?<<BR>
> <BR>
> I had a very powerful experience of this just yesterday when I<BR>
> facilitated a story circle (very similar to wisdom circles, dialogue<BR>
> circles, leadership circles - like From the Four Directions, etc.. and<BR>
> very akin to the principles of good conversation and what occurs in open<BR>
> space, I believe) for a group of 12 women entrepreneurs. There are very<BR>
> <BR>
> multi-cultural and multi-faith in composition (muslim, christian,<BR>
> native, atheist AND african, arabic, south american, north american, and<BR>
> european). The theme (as they are all developing speciality food<BR>
> products for wholesale and retail distribution) was: "Stories from the<BR>
> Kitchen: Recipes for our Life".<BR>
> As in open space, I did little except to open the circle/space, set a<BR>
> few conditions (one was we NEED each other - together we are greater<BR>
> than any of us could be individually and that we have the right to treat<BR>
> each other well in order to get what we need), and hold the container.<BR>
> Below are a few of the feedback comments that illustrate the power of<BR>
> 'moving toward another as a fundamental way of being':<BR>
> ~ Mind blowing. Difficult to list all the emotions and thoughts that<BR>
> were present. This is a huge experience, that will be carried forward<BR>
> and built on. More pieces to the puzzle, more insight into what makes<BR>
> people tick.<BR>
> ~ We need much more than the obvious to make our dreams come true. We<BR>
> can get so much from each other and we have something of value to offer<BR>
> others. Thank you!<BR>
> ~ This was a beautiful experience! Although I found it difficult at<BR>
> first to even think of something worthwhile to contribute, once we got<BR>
> rolling, there was no stopping us! Tremendous sharing of "life altering"<BR>
> stories. Great human bonding through tears and laughter.<BR>
> ~ I will remember the different experiences and it will have a great<BR>
> impact on my future. I am very grateful to be a part of this... I can't<BR>
> believe how my thinking will change the rest of my life.<BR>
> ~ I will always remember this day and keep it near to my heart and I<BR>
> will never forget the caring and loving people in it.<BR>
> <BR>
> To other aspects of your post - I would add that our right to treat each<BR>
> other well is a right born of all autonomous entities. Rights also have<BR>
> corresponding responsibilities that are attached. I am not speaking<BR>
> philosophically or spiritually here as much as evolutionarily. In the<BR>
> nested web of universal being we (humans) are up there on the<BR>
> evolutionary scale and therefore have 'rights'. However, our survival<BR>
> depends on supporting and maintaining the integrity of all that upon<BR>
> which we rest - a nation depends upon its citizens for its nationhood,<BR>
> individuals depend upon their own physiology for their being, which<BR>
> depends upon the plant and animal kingdom for survival, etc... all the<BR>
> way down to the cellular and even atomic level. It is this<BR>
> interdependency that attaches a requirement of response-ability. The<BR>
> 'rights' afforded us are inseparable from the responsibilities we also<BR>
> bear as a function of our dependence. This is the paradoxical and<BR>
> mysterious nature of complexity and transformation - the more power you<BR>
> have (in the form of 'rights' and autonomy), the more dependent and<BR>
> interdependent you also become. I see this in those who are leading<BR>
> the organizations I work with - the power also makes them vulnerable. It<BR>
> is my understanding that successful evolutionary adaptation, at this<BR>
> stage, must be based on cooperation and harmony with all other levels<BR>
> upon which we depend for our life. This isn't a guarantee - we also<BR>
> have the right to self-destruct, alienate, etc...<BR>
> <BR>
> I would add, from my understanding and experience, that although we may<BR>
> not have an obligation to 'treat each other well', we do have a<BR>
> responsibility. For me, this term takes a slightly different meaning<BR>
> than obligation or duty; one of response-ability. We are able to<BR>
> respond in a myriad of ways, both as individuals and as a species. We<BR>
> have the evolutionary capability and, given the current state of the<BR>
> larger environment, we also have a clear need, in terms of survival. The<BR>
> more the power, the more the vulnerability (direct relationship between<BR>
> rights and response-abilities)<BR>
> <BR>
> Open space is, in part, so valuable because it opens space for a wider<BR>
> range of choice in responding. Obviously this is no guarantee - we can<BR>
> choose to respond in self-destructive ways. And if we do so, I say 'so<BR>
> be it' - better for the overall endurance of healthy life, in general.<BR>
> <BR>
> I have digressed here from your points (hope you find them somehow<BR>
> meaningful!)....<BR>
> <BR>
> In the end, there endures that sense of mystery and wonder that is best<BR>
> tasted, by me, through story, metaphor, deep conversation, moments of<BR>
> profound contact with some aspect of the universe (including other<BR>
> people!)... One of my most important prompts for self-reflection, and<BR>
> which I regularly ask clients and students, is:<BR>
> What is my(your) relationship to mystery? Do you dance, run, hide from,<BR>
> <BR>
> fight against, make love with, feel screwed by, etc....it?<BR>
> <BR>
> with great love, appreciation, and best wishes,<BR>
> glory<BR>
> <BR>
> *<BR>
> *<BR>
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