grief work

Michael Wood mjwood at admin.uwa.edu.au
Thu Mar 12 17:45:27 PDT 2009


Thanks for these additional reflections Harrison.

I was recently asked to do a bit of 'grief work' with a team of 12 Youth
Workers - one of their regular `clients' had committed suicide.

We sat is circle, set up the principles of providing a safe place to
talk about what we were we thinking and feeling; not needing to solve
problems or `fix' anyone up; one person to be talking at a time;
listening for understanding rather than agreement; the `law of two
feet', so people could check out if they wanted to; agreed time (1 hour)
but with option of people hanging around afterwards over a cup of tea if
they wished (hence...whenever it's over it's over).

The Sponsor provided some factual information about what happened and
provided opportunity for questions of clarification

I offered a starting frame of three questions, but allowing for the fact
that the conversation would go where it needed to:

1. How are you responding to this personally?
2. What does this mean for your professional role as a Youth Worker?
3. What next?

Then handed over to them and tried to stay out of the way.

It seemed to 'work' but even that is such a difficult thing to assess. I
can only trust that 'whatever happened was the only thing that could
have'.

Michael Wood



-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of
Harrison Owen
Sent: Thursday, 12 March 2009 11:32 PM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: Re: grief work

Michael -- I am not suggesting that we never do something to facilitate
Griefwork. In fact there are a number of points where we can and I think
should be very proactive. Some of that may not seem like much, but it is
important. For example, the first stage of Griefwork is Shock/Anger. The
important thing here is to provide the time/space for people to really
get
it out. Normal social conventions suggest that we should try and calm
things
down -- after all things might get out of control. But my experience has
been that if that approach (calming) applied what happens is that
everything
just goes underground and smolders.

 

But my real point is that Griefwork is not our invention. True, we have
created the rituals of the Wake, Requiem Mass and the like -- but these
are
useful assists to a completely natural process which will take place
regardless. I think we have to be careful that we truly assist Griefwork
and
not get in the way of it -- which sometimes occurs when we attempt to
ritualize or institutionalize the process. The less we do, and the more
the
"grievers" do the better, I think. One more thing not to do.

 

And YES Tova -- NOW is definitely the time to revisit Griefwork. World
events would probably drive us to that revisitation anyhow, but as
professionals with assumed responsibility for the enhancement of human
life,
we have a special need for a critical look. I think the stakes are now
radically high. It is not about having "nice meetings" -- if it ever
was. It
is about creating the strong, rich space in which the chaos of our times
can
be embraced and transmuted into a new order. We cannot make it, bake it,
or
design it (the new order) but we can offer the space/time in which it
may
grow.

 

So stop grieving and let's get to work :-)   You said, "I really feel
the
overwhelm and think that grief work is in a desperate need of
revisiting,
maybe reinvention." Let's Do it!

 

 

Harrison 

 

Harrison Owen

7808 River Falls Drive

Potomac, Maryland   20854

Phone 301-365-2093

Skype hhowen

Open Space Training www.openspaceworld.com 

Open Space Institute www.openspaceworld.org

Personal website www.ho-image.com 

OSLIST: To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the
archives
Visit: www.listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html

 

 

-----Original Message-----
From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of
Michael
Wood
Sent: Wednesday, March 11, 2009 8:32 AM
To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
Subject: [OSLIST] grief work

 

thanks to those who sent suggestions of links relating to grief work

 

Harrison, yes, I'd seen some of your suggestions regarding grief work in
earlier books so it's interesting that you've come to the conclusion
that
grief works itself out in the natural process of Open Space without
necessarily having to do special rituals. I guess there have always been
and
continue to be rituals, like funerals for example, which we can also
draw on
for inspiration. I haven't yet seen a funeral conducted in a circle, but
that might be a great idea!

 

This is all helpful

 

Michael

 

________________________________

 

From: OSLIST on behalf of Harrison Owen

Sent: Tue 10/03/2009 22:47

To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU

Subject: Carol's Op-Ed article on weapons testing in the Wenatchee Daily
World -- NOW Grief work and OS

 

 

 

Michael --

 

 

 

Almost 30 years ago it occurred to me that the Griefwork Cycle applies
to
institutions/organizations just as it does to individuals - which is
where
it was originally discovered and described. I guess that shouldn't be
surprising, for after all -- it is all people. Anyhow, based on that
understanding I began to hold Wakes for corporations and other
organizations
that were passing from the scene. If you are interested you will find a
lot
of this described in several of my books. 

 

 

 

Later I learned that this was one more thing not to do. All you had to
do
was open space and the Griefwork cycle just naturally ran if there was a
need. Specifically - if you have an organization in major trauma either
because it is going out of business or thinks it might invite everybody
to
sit in a circle. No need to do anything special (as in presenting or
facilitating the process). It occurs quite naturally all by itself. The
theme will vary with the situation but usually I do something like "What
are
we going to do with the rest of our lives: Issues and Opportunities?" In
short order the people effectively become grief counselors to each other
--
and more often than not get well beyond that and start dealing with
creating
new futures, like business plans, etc.

 

 

 

For a long time I was both amazed and mystified by the depths reached by
those grieving people in open space. Particularly since they did it all
by
themselves and helped each other. I think I now understand what is going
on.
Open Space is a child of self organization - the natural, ongoing
process of
the cosmos itself for the last 13.7 billion years. The good news is that
life has evolved, but at a cost. It turns out that as self organization
happens there are a series of natural concomitants - chaos, conflict,
and
confusion all of which usually end up with ending or death. Doubtless we
might prefer something different - but there it is. Anyhow, I understand
Griefwork to be the naturally evolved human response to the process of
self-organization. An interesting question is how this process is coded
into
our collective lives ?? Since it operates everywhere and in a similar
fashion it would almost seem to be part of our genetic system.   But
that is
a puzzle for somebody else. What I do know is that everytime space is
opened, self-organization is energized - and the Griefwork process does
its
job. No help needed.

 

 

 

That is sort of a short tour - and if you want a more extended treatment
check out my last book "Wave Rider: Leadership for High Performance in a
Self Organizing world." 

 

 

 

Harrison 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Harrison Owen

 

7808 River Falls Drive

 

Potomac, Maryland   20854

 

Phone 301-365-2093

 

Skype hhowen

 

Open Space Training www.openspaceworld.com
<http://www.openspaceworld.com/>


 

Open Space Institute www.openspaceworld.org
<http://www.openspaceworld.org/>


 

Personal website www.ho-image.com <http://www.ho-image.com/>  

 

OSLIST: To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the
archives
Visit: www.listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html
<http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html> 

 

 

 

-----Original Message-----

From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of
Michael
Wood

Sent: Monday, March 09, 2009 9:58 PM

To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU

Subject: Re: [OSLIST] Carol's Op-Ed article on weapons testing in the
Wenatchee Daily World

 

 

 

Does anyone have any thoughts about when it is appropriate to run
something
specific around "grief" before opening a space (compared with just
allowing
the grief to emerge naturally as part of the Open Space)?

 

 

 

We have a few situations with large lay-offs of workers in mines and
factories, some affecting the entire fabric of small rural communities.
I
was mulling this over with my friend Brendan McKeaguea and we were
thinking
about what kinds of spaces might be needed in such situations when, in
the
first few weeks, the rage is so pronounced and people are simply not yet
ready to move forward?  

 

 

 

How might "grief work" be best facilitated in such situations? Has
anyone
used any particular process for collective grief work AND/OR used Open
Space
to help process this kind of grief?

 

 

 

Michael Wood

 

Western Australia 

 

 

 

________________________________

 

From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of
Harrison
Owen

Sent: Friday, 6 March 2009 11:44 PM

To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU

Subject: Re: Carol's Op-Ed article on weapons testing in the Wenatchee
Daily
World

 

Opening space for the news to break out is a marvelous idea, and
definitely
could put community news media in a new mode of being. In the northeast
of
the USA we have a great enterprise called Villagesoup. It started as a
(www.villagesoup.com <http://www.villagesoup.com/> ) online news outlet
and
with most of the content generated from the community. I am not sure how
they finance it, but it has a great deal of support and the idea is
definitely spreading. But I have always thought that they could really
get
double bang for their buck if they were to host what I might call
Community
Editorial Meetings. That would just be a fancy name for an Open Space
for
anybody who cared about issues in that community. Standard drill with
proceedings - which could then become new content. To be sure you can do
all
of this online, but as we all know online, good as it is, never quite
lives
up to f-t-f. It is nice to press the flesh, and great things happen with
a
hug, etc. 

 

 

 

And in this present moment - otherwise known as financial chaos - it is
safe
to say that folks are a little bit nervous, one might say fearful. And
fear
does terrible things to viable community. Folks stay inside, hunker
down,
stick their thumbs in their mouths, and assume the fetal position and
more.
That is what happens when folks experience shock -- the front end of
Griefwork. However, as we work our grief, fear can dissipate and new
futures
manifest. And boy do we need it! And every Open Space provides the
opportunity for this essential function (Griefwork) to do its work. And
not
incidentally, it is one hell of a story. All of a sudden we can see that
the
media is the message and the message is the media. Not too bad for a
day's
work. Go for it!

 

 

 

Harrison 

 

 

 

Harrison Owen

 

7808 River Falls Drive

 

Potomac, Maryland   20854

 

Phone 301-365-2093

 

Skype hhowen

 

Open Space Training www.openspaceworld.com
<http://www.openspaceworld.com/>


 

Open Space Institute www.openspaceworld.org
<http://www.openspaceworld.org/>


 

Personal website www.ho-image.com <http://www.ho-image.com/>  

 

OSLIST: To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options, view the
archives
Visit: www.listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html
<http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html> 

 

 

 

-----Original Message-----

From: OSLIST [mailto:OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU] On Behalf Of Carol
Hiltner

Sent: Thursday, March 05, 2009 10:46 AM

To: OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU

Subject: Re: [OSLIST] Carol's Op-Ed article on weapons testing in the
Wenatchee Daily World

 

 

 

Dear Michael!

That may well happen here -- immediately, in fact. In the course of our
conversation about the news business, I invited Rufus to attend the
"Leadership in a Self-Organizing World" event that will be in his
distribution area in Leavenworth, Washington in May. He was already
planning
to attend. So, those of you planning to attend might put on your
thinking
caps now about what "journalism that serves the community" looks like to
you; how you would leverage it for the "greater good"; and how it can
flourish in the new society we are "self-organizing."

Carol

 

On Thu, Mar 5, 2009 at 4:17 AM, Michael M Pannwitz <mmpanne at boscop.org>
wrote:

 

Dear Carol,

reading your note about the "World" and "journalism actually serves the
community" reminded me of the work our colleague Ingrid Olausson did in
Sweden years ago. She was engaged by regional editions of a large
Swedish
daily to facilitate open space events (with hundreds of participants)on
local issues with proceedings posted in the newspaper and followed up by
readers writing in.

Greetings from Berlin

mmp

 

Carol Hiltner wrote:

 

Hi all!

Major victory! *The Wenatchee World *will publish my Op Ed article about

weapons testing, attached and below.

 

The *World *was started by my grandfather Rufus Woods back in early
1900s to

provide local and national news to North Central Washington, and is now

published by his namesake, who is my cousin. It is now one of the last

family-owned daily newspapers in America -- one of the last places where

journalism actually serves the community.

 

In response to my submission and letter, he wrote, "These are indeed

fascinating times - lots of challenges yet amazing opportunities here at
the

newspaper. We're in total reinvention mode, getting back to the basics

of *serving

community* and in particularly more completely embracing the notion of

*celebrating

community successes* as a way to lift the conversation out of the morass
of

reactivity that is all too often the baseline of discourse."

 

If you'd like a whiff of nostalgia while supporting a rare and valuable

American treasure, bookmark the link http://wenatcheeworld.com/  I'd
like to

see them with a national following.

Best!

Carol

 

Navy weapons and weather control testing in Washington State

 

by Carol Hiltner

 

 

 

I received an e-mail last week that caught my attention. It proclaimed
that

the U.S. Navy was planning to use the whole northwestern U.S. for
military

target practice. *Wait a second,* I thought. *Could this be true? Isn't
the

Navy supposed to be defending us? *

 

Apparently the Navy has prepared the required environmental impact
statement

(EIS) that is subject to public comment until March 11th, and this
e-mail

outlined the author's questions and concerns.

 

So I read the e-mail. It was long, and contained a lot of technical

information that I couldn't assess. The author wasn't so concerned that
we

would shot at, as she was about the airborne residues of chemicals the
Navy

admits are toxic, such as depleted uranium and white phosphorus, that

American citizens would be breathing, eating, and drinking in
perpetuity.

 

Most of the requested target practice area is just off the Washington
coast,

from which prevailing winds would carry persistent toxins progressively

further inland. I wondered about the pollution of the orchards and wheat

fields of eastern Washington, the forests and cities of western
Washington,

and the immediate impact on our beleaguered fisheries. Could we indeed
be

victims of our own defense efforts?

 

*Democracy in action,* I thought. I have watched the surge of citizen

activism spawned by our presidential elections with hope and some
amazement.

I participated when our President-elect asked Americans to choose the

priorities for his administration by voting on the internet.

 

I was still caught up with the wave of people's empowerment when I got
this

e-mail, and I was alarmed about the prospect of the Navy turning its
weapons

of war on us, even indirectly. So I glanced at the summary of the
1000-page

EIS, commented via the Navy website, sent messages to my Senators and

Congressman asking them to look into this, and forwarded the original
e-mail

to my networks requesting their involvement in protecting the western
United

States.

 

Back through my network came news that Senator Conrad of North Dakota
had

responded. His staff determined that, based on what they found in the
EIS,

the area under discussion was much smaller than stated, but still worth

watching.

 

Concerned that I might have responded to a false alarm, but also
recognizing

that Senator Conrad's staff might not have found the proverbial needles
in

the 1000-page "haystack," I wrote the author, Rosalind Peterson, asking
for

citations to back up her assertions. She responded with a flurry of

forwarded government reports and studies.

 

What I discovered shocked me. From the mouth of Mrs. Sheila Murray, Navy

Region Northwest Environmental Public Affairs Officer, this EIS
addresses

only a minor adjustment to an on-going weapons testing and chemical
weather

control program not only on the West Coast, but also in Hawaii, Alaska,
and

parts of the East Coast. Weather control?! Who does this serve and what
is

the toxic cost? The actual operations areas may be mostly off-shore, but
it

is *our* weather that is being experimented with for the purposes of
war. It

is our survival that is being tinkered with through persistent toxic

chemical releases.

 

I personally live by the adage, "We get what we focus on." So, I focus
on a

humanity engaged in the wholeness of life. I see this situation as a
wake-up

call for us to individually and collectively participate in
decision-making

with a whole-systems, long-term perspective. This official request for

comments on the Navy EIS is an opening for citizens to impact the
direction

of the military that we pay for.

 

The U.S. Navy Environmental Impact Statement is posted at

http://www.nwtrangecomplexeis.com/. The original article that brought my

attention to this is posted at

http://www.newswithviews.com/Peterson/rosalind114.htm.

 

We can comment on-line until March 11th at

http://www.nwtrangecomplexeis.com/NtrcCommentForm.aspx, as well as
contact

our elected representatives.

 

 

 

Guest columnist Carol Hiltner is cousin of *World *publisher Rufus
Woods,

who once worked at the *World*. She is an author, artist, and activist
who

works collaboratively to access peace through multi-cultural awareness
and

friendship. She is currently focused on bringing forth the perspectives
of

the ancient indigenous culture of peace found in the Altai Mountains of

Siberia. E-mail: carol.hiltner at gmail.com. Websites:

 

www.AltaiMir.org <http://www.altaimir.org/>
<http://www.altaimir.org/>and

www.Altaibooks.com <http://www.altaibooks.com/>
<http://www.altaibooks.com/>.

 

*

*

==========================================================

OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU

------------------------------

To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options,

view the archives of oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:

http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html

 

To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:

http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist

 

 

-- 

Michael M Pannwitz, boscop eg

Draisweg 1, 12209 Berlin, Germany

++49-30-772 8000

mmpanne at boscop.org

www.boscop.org <http://www.boscop.org/> 

 

 

Check out the Open Space World Map presently showing 457 resident Open
Space
Workers in 73 countries working in a total of 139 countries worldwide

Have a look:

www.openspaceworldmap.org <http://www.openspaceworldmap.org/> 

 

*

*

==========================================================

OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU

------------------------------

To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options,

view the archives of oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:

http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html

 

To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:

http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist

 

 

 

 

-- 

Best regards,

 

Carol Hiltner

Founder, Altai Mir University

206-525-2101 (US)

913-462-6912 (Novosibirsk)

carol.hiltner at gmail.com

www.AltaiMir.org <http://www.altaimir.org/> 

www.AltaiBooks.com <http://www.altaibooks.com/> 

* * ==========================================================
OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU ------------------------------ To
subscribe,
unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of
oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:
http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html To learn about
OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:
http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist 

 

* * ==========================================================
OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU ------------------------------ To
subscribe,
unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of
oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:
http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html To learn about
OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:
http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist 

 

* * ==========================================================
OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU ------------------------------ To
subscribe,
unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of
oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:
http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html To learn about
OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:
http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist *
* ==========================================================
OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU ------------------------------ To
subscribe,
unsubscribe, change your options, view the archives of
oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:
http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html To learn about
OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:
http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist

 

*

*

==========================================================

OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU

------------------------------

To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options,

view the archives of oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:

http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html

 

To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:

http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist


*
*
==========================================================
OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
------------------------------
To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options,
view the archives of oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:
http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html

To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:
http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist

*
*
==========================================================
OSLIST at LISTSERV.BOISESTATE.EDU
------------------------------
To subscribe, unsubscribe, change your options,
view the archives of oslist at listserv.boisestate.edu:
http://listserv.boisestate.edu/archives/oslist.html

To learn about OpenSpaceEmailLists and OSLIST FAQs:
http://www.openspaceworld.org/oslist



More information about the OSList mailing list