Facilitator must be part of the conversations

[Lisa Heft]

Hello, all, and thanks for this conversation --

Personally, it is very important for me to be aware of the inherent power
dynamic I carry with me.  Whether I see myself as this or not, others can
often see me (the facilitator) as the expert, the person who knows so
much, the person who has wide experience in the field.  Again - whether it
is true or not.  And culturally, some in the group may feel that the
teacher (or whomever) is to be respected.  And / or that s/he may have
extra words of wisdom.  And so on.

Also, for me, it is very important that if the group is working on some
issue I really need to be involved with - that I find a colleague to
facilitate instead of me.  That I make a decision to either be a
participant or a facilitator / space-holder for the group.

To me, that is serving the group.  To be a clean and clear holder of space
so that they can do their best work.

Might I have some content information that can help them?  Sometimes.  But
I can always tell them that after the meeting.  Am I interested in what
they're talking about?  Maybe passionately.  But I can always read their
notes in the Book of Proceedings - I can even sneak around and pick up
coffee cups a bit more often in their area.  Do I want to listen in on
their conversations? Possibly.  Even when I am drawn closer to listen, I
try to be aware of my body language - to stand to the side and not
directly face the group, for example (because it can distract them) and
then to be sure that I leave soon.  Why? Because it is their work, not
mine.

Even when someone calls me over to a group - for example it's about AIDS
education and someone might say 'Lisa, can you tell us what you do when
you teach this in prison?' or whatever -- I will come and answer their
question, even (if they know me well) share thoughts for a minute - but I
will make sure to then get up and leave before I find that the
conversation is question and answer with Lisa.

There are breaks, sometimes lunch - other times in which folks may find me
for some conversation - and to me that is a bit different than their work
in sessions.  Still, I am careful not to direct or recommend content,
rather I am happy to engage in conversation.

When the group knows me *really* well I do not carry any power dynamic
with me - they don't care - don't see my input weighing any more than any
one else's.  Still, I don't stay in group conversations.  I alight, if
anything.  Because my role that day is to hold space for them.

And I never post sessions when I am facilitating. If I have something I
want them to talk about - to me, this would be my attachment to where they
go and what they talk about - and that, to me, is an indication I should
have brought in someone else in the facilitator role so I can jump on in
as a participant.

Some of you do things differently and I welcome that - this is just
explaining what my inner thinking is for why I do or do not engage as a
participant.

And I don't feel it is witholding my fullest self - I feel it is offering
my fullest self...in service to them, to their work.

Just another thought from someone who may do this as you do or not do this
as you do, dear readers,

Lisa

lisaheft at openingspace.net
http://www.openingspace.net

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