some recent bigotry on this list

[EVERETT813 at aol.com]

In a message dated 3/6/06 8:09:36 PM, therese.fitzpatrick at gmail.com writes:

> In the same nasty note, Paul portrayed a woman that Birgitt told us
> about as 'clearly mentally unstable."
> 
Tree,

Perhaps you should read Birgitt's post again, produced below, especially the 
first sentence or two.   It was that to which I was referring.   Sane people 
do not come up and scream at a leader because they could not make the choice to 
not participate.   That is extreme individualism and mental instability, in 
my humble opinion.

Further, your posts to me reek of another kind of individualism that feels it 
is OK to heap calumny, invective and profanity on another.   Perhaps you have 
not heard that the use of profanity is the attempt of a weak and disordered 
mind to express itself forcefully.

Since this is an unmoderated list anyone can post anything they wish.   I, 
however, do not wish to be the recipient of such ranting and ravings so will be 
exercising the law of two feet.

Paul

Birgitt's Post:

Years ago I was taught a big lesson. I facilitated an OST for about 300 
people, all of whom were on medications, all of whom had bipolar disorder or 
schizophrenia. And all of whom were leaders in their communities and incredible 
people. The side effects of the medications and of their illnesses had an effect 
on all that happened in the 3 day event. They found a way of working around it 
all to achieve what they wanted to achieve. They were remarkable. I was deeply 
moved. At the closing, I did something that I had learned from Harrison. 
After the microphone had gone around the circle for comments, I had everyone stand 
up and hold hands as the start of a closing to the event. We then did a the 
exercise of paying attention to the energy inside of the circle of us, and then 
turning 180 degrees to feel that energy at our backs as we went out into the 
world. When it was all done, a woman came up to me and in a rage said “Do not 
ever do that to another human being again. I had had a wonderful time here 
until you asked us to touch. And then it was destroyed for me. I cannot touch 
another person. It is my story and it has roots in my childhood and in my 
illness. By asking us to hold hands, I had a choice...to be part of what the group 
was doing and feeling violated by it, or not participating and feeling awful 
about that....neither option was okay for me. YOU (and she shouted) have NO IDEA 
of what anyone’s personal story is so you should never do this to a group 
again...to ask them to hold hands. You just don’t know what is going on for 
someone and by asking me to hold hands, you invaded my space.”

Tree's rants and raves to me, my replies, both public and by email:

Sent to me via email, not list)

just because people on the oslist believe in the principles of open
space, don't you think it about time you stopped taking advantage of
their good nature and stopped shoving your extreme indvidualism down
our throats?

you get, right, that people put up with your bigoted, out-of-date crap, 
right?

I am happy to tell the list what I really think of your recent, ugly
words about a woman you have outrageously concluded had to be
'mentally unstable' but I consider you to be a big mentally unstable.
. . so I won't.

who among us has never voiced angry, anxious energy form time to time?
who the fuck are you to declare someone mentally unstable?

and do you have any clue that the oslist is used by professional
facilitators to design real world events for real people and that,
golly gee, Paul, many events have people that bring their
individualism into a circle?   are you so ignorant about process design
and facilitation that you don't know a thing about it?

go pop off somewhere else, you bigoted old pig
--
Warmly,
Tree Fitzpatrick
Hearthkeeper

(Reply by Paul Everett)

Tree,

I thought we had a respectful agreement not to correspond with each other.   
Why have you violated that?   Think hard about what that implies related to 
your need to put me down.

Paul

WE did not have an agreement to not correspond with each other.

But okay, then I will tell the list what I think of your recent,
hideous, ugly, bigoted denigration of the mentally ill.

And, by the way, fuck you.   No respect from me.

Tree

I told you to leave me alone.   If you got the impression that you had
my respect, you misunderstood me.

Tree

(Paul’s reply to the above two notes)

Tree,

Yes, and I did leave you alone.   It is you who is not leaving me alone.   I 
did not comment on your post.   I expect you to afford me the same courtesy.   
As for respect, I was referring to the agreement, not you or me.   I know 
there is a mutual dis-respect there.

Paul

Posted to the OS List:

We were having a nice conversation on this list called 'a quiet time'.
. . and then Paul posted a couple of nasty phrases that stung me.

He wrote derisively about 'extreme individualism', making it feel to
me, in a very ugly way, that he does not think it is okay for people
to try to get their needs met.   His derisive portrayal of examples of
individuality as 'extreme individualism' left me thinking that he
might not be a professional designer of human gatherings. . . at least
not one with the value of inclusion.

In the same nasty note, Paul portrayed a woman that Birgitt told us
about as 'clearly mentally unstable."   Ouch.   That one seems even
uglier.   Who among us has never popped off, expressing anger in a less
than optimal manner?   It might not matter to most on this list but I
do have a mental health disability and I am fed up with being made to
feel like I have to tolerate ignorant, bigoted statements about the
mentally ill.   Like most bigotry, these kinds of statements usually
stem from the speaker's lack of knowledge about what they are talking
about.

I have made a personal commitment to point out bigotry when I see it
and I believe Paul's nasty comment of 'clearly mentally unstable' was
bigotry.   I know 'most people' routinely tolerate bigoted
generalizaitons about people with mental health disabilities and when
they do tolerate such bigotry, I always wonder why.   why would anyone
think people with mental health disabilities did not deserve the same
absence of bigotry as anyone else?

Sorry to bother the list with this but Paul's statements were, for me,
shockingly offensive.

Tree



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