Love and Crossing Open Space

[Harrison Owen]

There has never been a question in my mind -- Love is what makes the space
go round. Or something. But how to understand that Love? Or better, How to
be it?

Love is one of those wonderful words, at least in English, that can mean
just about anything you want. It seems to stretch all the way from raw
fornication to Divine Essence, and I suppose everything in between. In the
very early '80s I found myself thinking a lot about Transformation in
Organizations and the way in which the Griefwork process enabled that
process for individuals -- and for organizations as well, I thought.
Starting from the work of Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and friends I identified a
sequence of stages it seemed we all went through when chaos shattered our
lives in one way or another. Shock/Anger, Denial, Memories, Despair, Open
Space, End/Vision. There is good old Open Space right in the middle! But
for me at the time, it had nothing to do with a "Meeting Methodology" --
rather the searing/peaceful moment when it is all over and all starting.
That incredible time without time in the moment between breathing out and
breathing in. Nothing there and everything is potential. We all reach such
a space as individuals or organizations sooner or later. Nobody would
choose it for sure. So how do we cross that space?

Some of choose not to, and that is called "cashing in the chips" -- But if
we do cross it, or at least when I have crossed it, the "decision" to go
was made in response to a question -- What was I going to do with the rest
of my life? Note it is a question and not a statement or a plan. Questions
create space. Statements close it off. And the quality of asking always
seemed to me to be critical. It can not be an idle question -- rather a
question posed in Love.

But what would this Love be? For me, Love has two faces. One (which we all
enjoy) is called Acceptance. We are taken just the way we are, warts and
all, no further question. But that is not the only face of love. The other
is Challenge. And we often don't like this one too much. This is the
expectation that we become everything that we could be... nothing more,
nothing less. Love, it seems to me, is neither Acceptance nor Challenge,
but rather the space in between. And the magnitude of Love is measured by
the distance between. Great Love is ultimate acceptance and ultimate
challenge.

When we hear the question (What are you going to do with the rest of your
life?) asked with compassionate acceptance and radical challenge it becomes
possible to deal with our inadequacies and failures while simultaneously
moving on, across The Open Space to some new Vision for our existence. At
least that is my story.

When Open Space Technology appeared in the spirit of Two Martinis, what
struck me was the way in which this age old transformational drama seemed
to be taking place before my eyes. People were crossing Open Space. And so
the name -- Open Space. And I believe every time we Open Space, that drama
can take place again (no guarantees) provided we start with a question
(which itself is Open Space) and travel with Love. Not just warm fuzzy
love, but also the hard Love of radical challenge.

So if we are to talk about the central act or meaning of Holding Space -- I
think Love will do it. Once the space is open and the folks are at work,
there is nothing to do but take folks just the way they are, no matter what
shows up AND expect the very best. Acceptance and Challenge -- just Love. I
find that really doing all of the above is not accomplished with out energy
and intention. So at the end of every Open Space, when I have really done
my job, I feel pretty much like wilted spaghetti, but happily so,

So that went on a little longer than I anticipated. And if you are a real
glutton for punishment you might check out my last book, "The Power of Spirit."

Harrison


Harrison Owen
7808 River Falls Drive
Potomac, MD 20854 USA
phone 301-365-2093
Open Space Training www.openspaceworld.com
Open Space Institute www.openspaceworld.org
Personal website http://mywebpages.comcast.net/hhowen/index.htm

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